


M.E.R.L.I.N.

by Lunadeath02



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Future, Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Angst and Humor, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Character Death, sex with a robot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-26
Updated: 2013-03-26
Packaged: 2017-12-06 14:24:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 30,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/736664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunadeath02/pseuds/Lunadeath02
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Captain Arthur Pendragon mail orders for a companion robot to keep him company and provide him with sex while he's exploring the galaxy for unknown worlds; he didn't plan on getting MERLIN.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Mechanical Emulated Robotic Lad/Lass Into Nymphomania

**Author's Note:**

> Not sure where this idea came from, but the first grains of it might have been when I was thinking about the scene from Heavy Metal (the movie) where a woman was explaining to a robot why they couldn't go steady.

M.E.R.L.I.N. 01

Pairings: Arthur/Merlin, (background Gwaine/Elena and Lancelot/Gwen)  
Rated: NC-17  
Warnings & contents: sci-fi/futuristic AU, sex with a robot, language, somewhat Hurt/Comfort, mild angst, minor character death in later chapters.  
Notes: Not sure where this idea came from, but the first grains of it might have been when I was thinking about the scene from Heavy Metal (the movie) where a woman was explaining to a robot why they couldn't go steady.  
Summary: Captain Arthur Pendragon mail orders for a companion robot to keep him company and provide him with sex while he's exploring the galaxy for unknown worlds; he didn't plan on getting MERLIN.  
Disclaimer: the characters within do not belong to me, but Shine and the BBC (and the original Arthurian myth authors).

**

 

  
**M** echanical  
 **E** mulated  
 **R** obot(-ic)  
 **L** ad (/Lass)  
 **I** nto  
 **N** ymphomania

That was what was written precisely on the side of the crate when it arrived. Arthur was livid. He did _not_ order for a MERLIN, but a GWEN (Gorgeous Woman-bot Emulating Nymphomania). He'd have to go through the necessary paperwork to get this robot returned and then the other one—GWEN—wouldn't get to his Starship until about six to eight months, if there was no complications, and he didn't think he could wait that long.

Captain Arthur London Pendragon had been in space for nearly his entire life (born on board the floating space station Camelot Starfleet Enterprises but had taken Uni classes on Earth), and he'd been captain of his vessel, Excalibur, since he was sixteen. He was almost twenty-eight now, and when he ordered for his companion robot he didn't think much on it other than relieving his boredom and sexual needs. He wanted more than just his hand and the entire galaxy worth of porno for stimulation.

It was often lonely out there in space. His mission was to help Camelot Enterprises locate new worlds and possibly new life. So far, in the known history of the human race, there had been over a hundred new planets discovered (that could easily sustain life) but only one other humanoid species had been found. If Arthur remembered his ancient history well, there had been a huge, complex battle between Earth's humans and the other planet's (located in the constellation of Aries) beings that'd been named Areslans by humans but later discovered were actually called Jinns. They looked almost identical to Earthlings that at times it was hard to tell they were aliens if put in a crowd on Earth (if they were the same skin tone, that was; normally they had blue or pink skin).

Almost fifteen years later after the galactic war started, they'd finally made peace with them. Since then, they (the Earthlings) had been desperate to find other planets with other human-like beings. Arthur had no idea why, since the last time they made contact with an alien race they had a galactic war that killed trillions of their kind and nearly made them an endangered species. _Homo sapiens_ were a strange breed.

So here he was, a captain of his own vessel, with nary another human on board, searching a part of space that was unknown to the Camelot Starfleet, making charts and maps and collecting data. He was alone in the mission, as per rules after proving himself and getting his captaincy (he was supposed to get his own crew after this mission was complete – if he chose to continue with his life on Excalibur), and had been since sixteen. He hadn't found so much as an alien germ.

Sometimes he wished he hadn't earned his rise.

Now he was stuck with this… MERLIN. Still, Arthur Pendragon was like most human beings of his era: moderately bisexual (or pansexual, as many liked to call themselves during this space age). He swung more on one side of the sexual spectrum than the other, though; meaning he was usually more interested in the female sex. But there had been plenty of times when he found the male body most pleasant to the eye (and in his imagination while wanking), so it wasn't like he couldn't make it work with a male bot; he'd just would've rather had the GWEN.

Furious that they got his order wrong, Arthur was about to fill out a complaint form when the door to the crate swung open on its own. It usually meant that the MERLIN was fully functional already and was ready to serve.

Arthur froze the second the MERLIN came out, pen poised in the ready position and clipboard in his other hand. The MERLIN series wasn't what he had expected. He'd heard they were doing marvelous things with robots' features and coloring but he had no idea they'd achieved such lifelike structures. This model had the usual latex, synthetic skin, which was milky-smooth and nearly flawless (except for the occassional freckle or beauty mark added on for realism), but the bot also had raven dark hair, large and expressive blue eyes, long eyelashes, large-ish ears, a perfect red mouth, and a sinewy, lanky body that moved almost cat-like when it walked. The clothing the MERLIN was wearing wasn't even that extraordinary either: just the normal, average clothes that people wore during that time and age, which included blue jeans and a stylish brown jacket. Arthur was so transfixed that he hadn't realized the MERLIN bot stopped five inches from him and stared back.

He'd been shaken out of his thoughts when the robot finally spoke, which was odd because the last he knew of companion robots they normally didn't speak unless spoken to.

"Hello, Captain Arthur Pendragon. I am MERLIN, the Mechanical Emulated Robotic Lad that is Into Nymphomania. I am fully functional and ready to serve you in all ways imaginable. I am, what my maker had called, the perfect companion and servant, and I am yours to command."

The only thing that flew out of Arthur's shocked mouth was, "You spoke first."

The MERLIN ducked his head and shuffled a toe on the ground, emulating embarrassment. A robot, embarrassed? Now Arthur had seen everything!

"I apologize, sir, but you were in a daze and I thought it best if I said something first or we might have been standing here for hours before you got your human brain to fully function again."

"Cheeky, too," Arthur snorted. He tapped the end of his pen on the clipboard that was still in his hand and thought about what to do. "But at least you're not too hard on the eyes."

"I am pleased you find my appearance to be gratifying. I also apologize for sounding cheeky, but I am what you humans call a prototype."

"Oh, lovely," Arthur rolled his eyes. He finally got his feet to move, turning back toward Excalibur's bridge to check their position and the other things he needed to check to make sure the ship was still in working order, while he quickly scribbled on his clipboard. He still felt the need to send a complaint. "I'm a captain of a Camelot Starfleet vessel, been in outer space for more than twelve years, and they send me a prototype! Am I not as important as they think I am?"

"You are very important, sir," the MERLIN said, following Arthur back to the bridge. "One of the main reasons they sent me was _because_ I am a prototype. They know of your merits and knowledge in the field of robotics and knew you would be capable of handling one of the prototypes that had been built, and that you would give a most accurate report of my operations in full details. I am more than just a companion and sex emulator, sir. I have also been programmed to take on some of the more difficult functions of the ship."

Arthur stopped in front of the door and spun round to face MERLIN, surprised. The MERLIN almost collided with Arthur but was able to back-up in time, albeit a little wobbily as if it were about to fall over.

"You—you can do maintenance on a Starfleet ship?"

"Affirmative, sir." Here, the MERLIN smiled a little, almost as if it was pleased, and Arthur found he rather liked that smile. It looked so human. "I am also able to distinguish human emotions and reactions to other stimuli. It is a high function on most sex bots, but was discovered to be a good addition in robots that help the upkeep on starships. I am programmed to know what you feel and how things affect you so that I may be most capable of handling any situation you—we—find ourselves in."

Arthur goggled at the robot. He couldn't come up with a response to that at the moment, so he turned and walked through the sliding door and onto the bridge. MERLIN had, without a doubt, followed him in.

Arthur sat in his captain's chair. He liked sitting here when he had a lot of things on his mind, or when he just liked to relax and contemplate his next destination. The MERLIN immediately went about checking and re-checking all the ship's instruments and then the maps Arthur had been charting. Arthur didn't want to say anything for fear that it might come out as arrogant or angry. The MERLIN was sure to pick up on it and most likely offer sex to help him relax. His head was too full of questions and confusion to be in the mood for sex, and with a male robot no less.

When the MERLIN finished his, more than likely, automatic diagnostic of the ship and its charts, it sat in the navigator's seat one tier down from Arthur's chair.

"Everything is functioning properly, Captain," MERLIN said as it flipped and hit buttons and switches. "I am steering the ship now toward one of the final clusters of stars not registered on the star chart."

"Ah… good," Arthur said. He sighed. He really can't get angry at MERLIN for doing what he'd been programmed to do. "Thank you, MERLIN. Please leave me alone now."

"I sense confusion, irritation, and tension from you, sir," MERLIN said, turning in his chair to look up at Arthur. "I suggest you get some rest. You may feel better afterwards."

"Are you sure it isn't sex I need?" Arthur snapped. He stood from his seat and quickly made his way to the exit.

Before Arthur reached the door, he heard MERLIN reply with, "Your emotional condition would make you reject any stimuli I would give you at the present time—"

When the door slid shut behind him, Arthur let out a long breath, closed his eyes, and leaned his head back against the door. It was going to be a long ten months.

**

It didn't take long for Arthur to crumble.

Even though the MERLIN was right in almost everything he suggested, he wasn't about to admit it. It was selfish of him, and a bit arrogant, he knew, but he also knew that MERLIN knew that pride was one of his weaknesses. MERLIN didn't bring it up, seeing how he could sense it, and knew it was something he could not broach just yet. But almost a week after the MERLIN had arrived, Arthur felt the buddings of sexual need floating to the surface once more. It was harder (no pun intended) to keep his erection in check. MERLIN, naturally, sensed it, but kept wisely silent.

It was when Arthur was getting ready for bed, MERLIN turning back the bed sheets, when he actually did something about it. Or, more like, MERLIN sensed Arthur was ready and offered his services.

"Sir," it said, as Arthur pulled on his sleep pants, facing away, "I am fully efficient in all manners of sexual intercourse, including with men. My programs include all sorts of foreplay and kinks, and if there is anything you do not enjoy, do not hesitate to tell me. I am fully equipped with all manners of lubrications as well, if you are so inclined to go in that direction tonight."

Arthur felt a full-body flush, his nape and ears hot, merely from what MERLIN had said. It had been an awful long time since he'd had any kind of one-on-one sex with anyone. Even though MERLIN was clearly a robot it was better than nothing, and it was one of the main reasons why he ordered for the sex robot in the first place. There was no one else on board the ship, so why was he so embarrassed? It was probably his self-conscious awareness that it would be his first time with someone—or rather some thing—that wasn't female.

"I fully comprehend," MERLIN continued, "that if you are embarrassed by having sex with me for the first time, you may want to start off with something small. We could just rub our sexual appendages together or I could take your erect penis into my mouth. I have a suction that rivals any Hoover or vacuum cleaner ever invented…"

"Yes, fine," Arthur said tersely, wanting to get on with it already. "We'll do that. Lights off," he instructed Excalibur, and the lights automatically shut off. Arthur knew just where his bed was, which was only a couple feet away, and easily found it. Once under the covers, he slipped his sleep pants off, tossed them on the floor, and looked up.

MERLIN's eyes were glowing like the numbers on an old alarm clock. It was so eerily blue and bright that it lit up nearly all of MERLIN's face and neck, and some of his upper chest. The MERLIN was naked, at least from what Arthur could tell. He felt his erection twitch as MERLIN came closer, those glowing eyes staring right at him.

"Bloody hell, MERLIN—" Arthur gasped.

"Your exclamation of shock suggests you approve of how I look. This is an above average response—"

"Shut up and get between my legs!"

"Yes, sir," MERLIN said. It obeyed, and Arthur was startled to find that the MERLIN wasn't cold at all, like the other robots Arthur had worked with before becoming captain of the Excalibur. No, MERLIN was very warm, as was the glow coming from his—its—eyes.

"MERLIN… you're—"

"Warm? Yes, sir. I have an inward generator that makes heat and a regulating system connected to that that helps control the heat. As is my programming, it is capable of reaching a certain temperature; especially while performing sex. It is to help make sex most enjoyable and as real as possible—"

"All right, I get it. Now then, you said something about your mouth on my dick?"

"I can get straight to that, sir, or would you prefer a little kissing beforehand? Most humans like to get a little intimate in that area for comfort reasons and—"

Arthur cut him off with a kiss, and MERLIN was clearly programmed to be a great kisser as well, he found. It wasn't overly sloppy, but wet enough so they could kiss in the way Arthur found enjoyable, open and with tongue. Arthur could tell immediately that MERLIN's tongue wasn't human, but it hardly mattered. The feel of MERLIN on top of him, kissing him like this, hands roaming and hips gyrating, was the best thing he'd felt in years. There was no squeaking or creaking of any kind, from MERLIN or from his state-of-the-art cloud bed.

"Shall I trail a straight line of kisses down to your erect penis, sir?" MERLIN said, tone almost flat but with slight emotion behind it.

"Yes, please," Arthur moaned. "And call me Arthur for now."

"Yes, Arthur," MERLIN said, smiling softly. "It is understood that while becoming intimate with someone in bed, humans like to hear their first names spoken, which in turn—"

"Less babble, more sex," Arthur demanded.

MERLIN obeyed, slowly moving down Arthur's body, kissing and sucking on the way, and in just the right way. Arthur moaned as MERLIN grazed a nipple, and the moment MERLIN located the head of his cock, MERLIN teasingly lapped and kissed it before slowly going down on him. Arthur arched his back and whimpered. He hadn't felt such wonderful, wet suction on his cock in so long, and it was all he could do not to come right away. He wanted this to last more than at least five minutes.

Arthur had kept his eyes shut most of the time, but when he opened them finally, out of shock at the feel of MERLIN cupping his balls, he was startled by how MERLIN's eyes were still glowing. They were dimmed a bit, because his eyelids were halfway closed, but it was still a little eerie.

"Could you… either keep your eyes closed or maybe turn the blue light off? It's a little distracting."

"I shall turn them off," MERLIN said, and did so. "I can still see in the dark with my infra-red sensors—"

"Okay, okay, don't go into scientific details. It's a turn-off."

"I apologise, Arthur, sir."

Arthur sighed and settled back more into his pillow. He shifted his body to be more comfortable, and after a few more wonderful pulls from MERLIN's mouth, he threaded his fingers through MERLIN's surprisingly soft hair. MERLIN's throat then vibrated, as if humming in pleasure from Arthur's touch, and Arthur lost it. Shuddering, he came down MERLIN's gaping throat.

As he slowly came down from the orgasmic high, chest rising and falling, and MERLIN resting his face against his stomach (Arthur's fingers still in those soft locks), he wondered just where in MERLIN's robotic body his semen would end up.

**

Three days later, the post finally arrived.

It was normal for letters and packages to arrive months after being sent, he was in outer space after all, and e-mail took less time but still had to travel. So getting letters from family and friends after such a long wait wasn't so surprising. What was surprising, however, was his robot companion getting mail.

"To M.E.R.L.I.N. friend on the Excalibur Starship," Arthur read aloud, shocked. "From G.W.A.I.N.E. on Camelot Enterprises." He looked over at MERLIN in shock and then waved the letter in its face. "What's this all about then?"

MERLIN ducked his head in embarrassment, something Arthur was getting accustomed to, even though he knew he shouldn't. "It is a friend—comrade robot called GWAINE. I met him during my first few days after being booted up and trying out my functions and appendages."

"And what does G.W.A.I.N.E. stand for exactly? Is it another prototype like you?"

"Yes, sir," MERLIN answered. "Except not as new a model as me. His name stands for Gorgeous Working And Intergalactic Nymphomania Emulator. He is the second in his series."

"What's the first in his series?" Arthur dared to ask. His curiosity seemed to be transmitting just fine to MERLIN because MERLIN answered him with a cheeky grin.

"Gorgeous Automaton Worker And Intergalactic Nymphomaniac."

Arthur handed over the letter, putting the rest of his curiosity aside for now, and opened a letter addressed to himself. It was from a friend he'd made while attending University. They were both interested in the space program and wanted to explore the stars and work with everything that had to do with space, space travel, and even robots.

Leon Knight was a good man, full of honour, pride, dignity, curiosity, and hope. He was much like Arthur, which was probably why they clicked. They'd both promised to keep in touch, and Leon's letter wasn't the first in their correspondence. The last letter he'd received, Leon had told him that he was finally getting married to his long-time girlfriend of so many years, and that he'd wished Arthur could be there. Of course, being stuck in space made it a mite difficult to attend.

Leon's newest letter explained to him how the wedding went, what happened during the wedding, and afterwards. Weddings were no longer the norm when it came to staying with the person you loved, but still considered a binding contract and that if you broke that contract it was up to the individuals on what to do. Anyone could get married, no matter their gender, ethnic, colour, or whatever. A person could even get married to a space alien, if the alien's parents agreed to it. Arthur remembered the news report of the first Earthling and Areslan wedding. It was a very controversial thing in the beginning, but now it wasn't a big deal. Nothing surprised him anymore.

He looked up from his letter to see a smile on MERLIN's face. Curiosity struck him again.

"So, what does GWAINE say?" he asked.

"It is in code," MERLIN said. "All ones and zeroes. You would not be able to understand it. I could translate it for you if you wish."

"Please do," Arthur said.

MERLIN nodded and obeyed. "GWAINE says he has been given to a human, like I had, and the human's name is Elena. GWAINE says that she is very sweet, but a little clumsy at times. He has had to clean up after her a lot, but they get on well. He says the sex is most adequate and that Elena has as many as five orgasms in one night—"

"Yes, thank you, MERLIN. I don't need to know their personal sex life. It's nice, though, to know you have a friend among your fellow robots." Arthur patted a warm hand onto MERLIN's shoulder. "Well done."

"It is not unheard of, sir," MERLIN said, ducking his head again. "It is surprisingly most satisfying, though, to have a friend within the same robot clan that's from the same maker."

Arthur didn't know why he did it, but out of impulse he leaned forward and planted a soft kiss to MERLIN's cheek. MERLIN beamed even more from that, warmth flooding his face. "You did not have to do that, sir—"

"What else does your friend say?" Arthur asked, trying to cover his own embarrassment. He didn't want to look too deep into what he'd just done.

"He says that they—the Camelot Enterprises—are working on improving my model, and are thinking about calling it something else, but they may just keep the name MERLIN. It is quite the popular name for boys now on Earth."

Arthur felt proud, and happy, suddenly, to have the first prototype of the MERLIN series. He wasn't sure if he'd ever replace MERLIN with any other.

"Would the newer model look just like you?"

"It is possible," MERLIN said. "They are also working on a female version and thinking of calling it FREYA. If they do then that means, in human lingo, she would be my sister."

"And what would FREYA stand for, do you think?"

"Possibly: Female Romantic (or Randy) Emulated Young Automaton. Then again, I could be mistaken. It is not often that I am wrong, but sometimes I am unable to read exactly what is on the minds of humans—"

Arthur interrupted MERLIN before he got too far into his technical speech. "Let's hope that you will one day be a brother then, MERLIN. One of us shouldn't be an only child."

"Indeed, sir." MERLIN beamed again. It was so lovely Arthur just had to kiss him, and on the lips this time.

**

Arthur really should have expected it, but like the human that he was that erred often, he didn't. The realization of how he felt hit him like a ton of… well, something very heavy.

It happened almost right after they finished having sex for the who-knew-how-many times. Arthur was wet and open, on his knees and spread comfortably across his bed sheet, face planted into his cloud pillow; MERLIN was on top, thrusting in precise precision, pushing all of Arthur's buttons exactly how he liked it. The moment he felt MERLIN's sticky, wet substance that passed as semen fill his arse, he came, arse clenching around MERLIN's thick and long synthetic cock. When MERLIN removed his retractable sexual appendage from him, fluid escaped Arthur's red, beaten hole. Arthur moaned into his pillow and lay still to bask in the aftermath.

That was when realization had struck: he was falling for his own robot. As idiotic as it was, it wasn't anything new. He'd known many others on Earth that devoted themselves to their mechanical companions, even to go as far as almost marrying them. Arthur wasn't sure if it was legal to marry your robot yet, but the time he'd been away—given that time moved a bit slower here in space—he wouldn't be a bit surprised that some people had been given the right to do so (and that it was possibly legal now).

That didn't mean he'd marry MERLIN. Just because he was growing more attached to him didn't mean a thing. It was likely thanks to all the sex they'd been having, that was all. MERLIN was programmed to provide wonderful sex, and he was letting his emotions run away with him.

"I sense you are very pleased with our coupling that time, sir—Arthur," MERLIN said, lying beside him. Arthur automatically turned and pulled MERLIN close, resting his forehead in the crook of MERLIN's neck. MERLIN put his arms around him, as if in a habitual gesture. It must be in his programming to cuddle, if the human partner desired it.

"Yes, indeed…" Arthur sighed. "I'm very pleased and well-sated. Thank you, Merl."

MERLIN tittered, which he usually did whenever Arthur called him by his pet name. Arthur was growing to love that little laugh.

"I am pleased that you are pleased, Arthur. When should I make your dinner? You will take a nap, as you normally do after having intense sexual intercourse. I could tidy up while you sleep, and then perform maintenance on the ship before making your food."

"Sounds wonderful, Merlin. Thanks."

"My pleasure, sir," MERLIN said softly. "I will also check on the post."

"Mmm," Arthur said, acknowledging and agreeing with his statement. His last thoughts before falling asleep were of Merlin, and in his dream Merlin was a real human being, capable of all the human emotions and able to bleed actual blood when he pricks his finger on the sewing needle. Merlin's expressive, surprised eyes in the dream caused a warm, fluttering feeling in the pit of his stomach and he smiled in his sleep.

When he woke up, he smelt food cooking in the kitchen. His stomach growled, indicating that he was indeed hungry, so he got out of bed and put his dressing gown on.

The smell of frying (imitation) meat wafted to his nose, making his mouth water. When he came into the kitchen he saw MERLIN at the stove, serving up his plate. The juice maker on the other side was automatically squeezing his juice and the other was pouring fresh water. There were even vegetables and fruit served, as his diet had dictated.

"Evening, Merl," Arthur said, sitting at his usual place at the table. "That smells divine."

"Thank you, sir," MERLIN grinned. He finished fixing his plate with the right amount required, and came over and set it down in front of him. "Here's your food. Enjoy, sir."

"I will, thanks," Arthur said, and tucked in. MERLIN brought over his glasses of water and juice. He then picked out a dessert, as if to tempt him, to place in front of his dinner plate. It was his favorite: cherry cheesecake.

"Little tease," Arthur said. MERLIN blushed prettily, eyes bright.

"I'm only trying to make you happy, sir."

"You make me very happy, MERLIN." Arthur didn't think he'd ever felt this happy before in all his life.

"I'm glad, sir. I'm also glad that you're in a good mood… what is it, sir?" he asked, because Arthur was staring at him oddly.

"You—you used contractions. You never used to do that before; you'd always say the entire word, never abbreviating them like humans do."

"Oh," MERLIN said, ducking his head, and his face was going quite red now. He'd never seen MERLIN blush so hard before!

"What's the reason, I wonder," Arthur said, staring hard at MERLIN. "Don't get me wrong, I'm not angry with you. I rather like that you're speaking more like a human being."

"That… pleases you, sir?"

"It does. It would also please me if you stuck to using just my name."

"Oh, but—but that would be rude…"

"Not if I ask you," Arthur urged. "Please, Merl? I think it's about time we got past the honorifics now, don't you? We've been shagging for almost two months now."

"If that's what you wish of me, sir—er, Arthur." MERLIN blushed again. "And we've been shagging because I am programmed to—"

"Yeah, yeah, I know," Arthur interrupted. "It's just one of those human things, you see."

"Yes…" MERLIN started, but then cut himself off before he continued his sentence. His eyes glanced over to the doorway leading to MERLIN's room and then he went back to his normal duties.

MERLIN had his own room, courtesy of Arthur. He knew that MERLIN didn't need sleep, but he still powered down from time to time to save on energy, and he had slowly been accumulating his own belongings like any normal human would (Arthur had even discovered that MERLIN had a space rock collection; a rock from each planet they'd orbited and collected samples from, if it had a rocky surface that was). He needed a place for all his stuff, so Arthur gave him a room. When Merlin had looked toward his room, it made Arthur wonder if Merlin needed to power down for a bit or if he got something in the post that he hadn't told Arthur about yet.

"Was there anything in the post?" he dared to ask.

Merlin looked shifty, which again was odd for him. It was very hard for Merlin to lie as well, so Merlin offered a small "yes" but continued with his chores without interruption.

Arthur studied him after that. Merlin did not look like he normally did: confident, at ease, graceful, meticulous. He looked almost edgy, anxious, and even a bit impatient. It was incredible how much Arthur had learned to read Merlin's moods almost as well as Merlin could read his.

"Was there something important that came in the post, then? Did you get something from GWAINE?"

Merlin nodded this time, his eyes staying on his work. Now he knew something was up, especially when Merlin wouldn't meet his eyes or even speak out loud.

"All right, tell me," Arthur demanded. "What did you get?"

Merlin looked almost embarrassed, as if robots shouldn't be allowed to receive more mail than their masters. But then he quietly answered, "It's—it was a present."

"He sent you something? That was nice of him," Arthur said. Merlin nodded. "So, what did he get you?"

"I will show you if you really wish to know."

"I do," Arthur said.

MERLIN looked a tad worried, and hopefully that didn't mean anything except that Merlin was only worried about receiving something instead of Arthur.

He followed Merlin to his room the minute he'd finished his meal. When Merlin opened the door and brought him to look at his present, he wouldn't look at Arthur. He just hung his head as if expecting to be shut down and reprogrammed.

"A plant?" Arthur gasped. It was rare, and difficult, to send a plant through space. Usually by the time it arrived it was dead. This one had somehow miraculously stayed alive, and there were even pink flowers blooming on it.

"Please, sir," MERLIN said, and it was never good when Merlin started using honorifics again. "Please don't take it away. It means a lot to me that I now have my very own plant to take care of. Robots aren't normally allowed to look after plants, if they're not gardener bots. They're only to look after the people they're assigned to. GWAINE knows that I've always wanted a plant to care for, that is why he and Elena sent me one. I don't know if they had forgotten about you and what your reaction to it would be, but it means that much more to me that they are forgetful in their kindness. Please, sir, please do not destroy the plant."

Arthur heaved a big sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. MERLIN was giving him the puppy dog eyes, even if that wasn't what Merlin usually called it (Merlin called it his pleading, desperate eyes, but it still looked like puppy dog eyes to Arthur), and it was so hard to say no to Merlin whenever he did it. Arthur understood how much the plant meant to Merlin, but the rules stated that no plant or animal was allowed on board. He couldn't remember the particulars, but it had something to do with oxygen intake and water consumption, and all those other minor things that really added up. A plant (or animal) took away resources from the human, and on his mission of exploration it was a giant no-no. What if they did find another planet similar to Earth? They couldn't introduce a foreign object, if what they learned on Earth taught them anything.

Which was why Arthur had been so lonely and in need of someone. Not just because of his libido, of course, but that was one of the main reasons why he ordered for a robot. A robot didn't use up human resources, except maybe electricity, but that wasn't hard to find in space. All Arthur needed to do was get close to one of the suns or large stars to power up his generator (and back-up generators) using its light, and bob's your uncle. A robot didn't need food or water or vitamins or—much of anything. They were, more or less, a walking and talking computer (and also, in Merlin's sense, a life-like blow-up doll with sexual attachments).

But obviously this MERLIN prototype needed something else to care for besides Arthur. The plant was like a pet, but he didn't know if he should allow Merlin to keep it. He could get into serious trouble with Headquarters.

"It's against the rules," Arthur said slowly, watching Merlin's reaction.

"I know," Merlin said quietly, eyes fixed on his shoes. He was not arguing which, of course, meant Arthur was right. They had argued only twice since they'd known each other, and Arthur had been in the wrong both times because of his pride and hating admitting he was wrong on something.

"We could get into serious trouble—" Arthur started, but stopped when Merlin looked at him. It was hard to look away, and he felt his resolve crumble. MERLIN was his servant, his robot, and he could easily order him to destroy the plant, but he just couldn't do it. His stupid human emotions were playing havoc on him.

Finally, he sighed and said, "Fine then. Keep it. Just remember that it's your responsibility."

Merlin beamed then, brighter than he'd ever seen on Merlin, and it caused a funny, happy feeling within his stomach.

"Thank you, Arthur!" Merlin hugged him, shocking Arthur into hugging back. Such emotions in a robot like this were rare. He must make a report on it.

**

Merlin let Arthur fuck him in any way he wanted, possibly in gratitude for allowing him to keep the plant. Merlin was already slick and soft, like any other sex bot, and Arthur slid in with only a couple thrusts. He stilled his hips; just the feel of Merlin around his cock was excruciating torture. The softeness of his insides, the perfect friction, and the rhythmic pulse beating in time with Merlin's mechanical heart (for realism, of course)—it was all too much. Arthur fucked him slow and shallow at first, but was overcome within a few minutes. He deepened his thrusts and rolled his hips, the pressure and sensations perfect around his cock.

He wanted it to last but his climax was coming up faster than he'd hoped. He pumped with elongated strokes, from tip to base, pushing deeper every time. As he neared completion, Arthur lowered his head down to capture Merlin's lips and they kissed messy and wild, and Arthur's hips stuttered.

He came harder than he ever thought possible, filling Merlin's robotic body with his human seed. He never did get to ask where it all went, but he was too sated to care.

***


	2. A Robot With Feelings?

**

A week later, after another bout of unbelievable, hot sex, Merlin turned to Arthur (who was sated, sweaty, and trying to get his breathing under control) and said:

"I propose we marry."

Arthur's eyes widened as he stared up at the ceiling, his eyebrows slowly climbing his forehead. After such great sex, that was the last thing he thought he'd hear. Arthur thought discovering where his semen went inside Merlin's body was a shocker (Merlin had an actual plastic bag inside him that connected to his anus, and he'd been storing the semen in a cold, separate compartment that kept Arthur's little swimmers alive – for what reason, he could only guess). This, however, might have reached the top ten on the weirdo metre.

"Me, marry a robot?" he gasped.

"Yes," Merlin said. He turned to his side to get a better look at Arthur, placing a hand onto Arthur's furry, blond chest. "Why not?"

"There's plenty of reasons why not," Arthur said. He rolled out of bed, leaving Merlin lying there looking up at him in confusion.

"But we have all the makings of a great, meaningful relationship," Merlin said. "We care about each other, we have a great companionship, we compromise well, we understand each other—"

"To a point." Arthur hurriedly got dressed, his mind and heart battling it out.

"—and we have proficient, fantastic sex. So why can't we get married?"

"For one thing, I'm more into women than men," Arthur said. He finished getting dressed just as Merlin hopped out of bed, looking less tired than Arthur and not feeling the cool air. He followed Arthur out of the bedroom while Arthur continued, "I like tits and vaginas and curves and… you know, the fairer sex which can have multiple orgasms."

"I could easily have more than one orgasm, if that is what you prefer."

"Can you suddenly become female? No, I don't think so. And secondly, I'm a human being and you're a robot. I doubt that we'd even be allowed."

"Moot point, sir. I believe that back on Earth there are celebrities marrying their robots, and a few have taken more than one as a lover, even if they are married to someone else," Merlin said, his sadness showing through even if he was trying to be logical about it all. "I am a robot but have all the functions and abilities of a human being, except for one thing: I cannot reproduce. But seeing how I am male that is also a moot point."

"And another thing," Arthur said, turning to face Merlin. "I'll grow old, you won't."

"I'll grow old as well," Merlin said. "I just won't look it. I may need new parts down the line—be upgraded and such, but I won't get wrinkles like a human."

"Exactly my point!" Arthur turned and made a beeline for the bathroom. "There's bound to be disaster in me marrying a robot. My father expects children and I need to find a wife in order to do that, which most likely means marrying her, and if she knew I was already married to my robot, what would she think? She would more than likely come from a family of tradition, since mine does, so of course she wouldn't approve of it."

Before he could turn and shut the door, Merlin carefully asked, "Do you need help washing your back, sir?"

"No, thank you," Arthur said. "Just… go check the ship's charts and things while I'm in here."

"Yes, sir," Merlin sighed.

If Arthur didn't know any better, he'd think he'd upset Merlin. But that was silly; robots don't get upset. Not to the point that humans did, at any rate. Robots were not programmed to have such emotions.

**

Boy, was Arthur wrong about Merlin's feelings.

The thing about robots was, normally they weren't supposed to have human emotions. When the sex robots came on the market, they had to be programmed to understand how human feelings worked and what triggered them. The robots themselves were not supposed to be able to imitate human feelings, just understand them.

The next day when Arthur finished up some reports, sent them through to headquarters at Camelot Enterprises, and then charted more stars and planets (most were gas giants and had nothing solid to them); Arthur left the bridge and headed toward his room to relax. As he passed by the room that his MERLIN bot used, he thought he heard something odd. It was odd because he never heard it come from Merlin's room before. He knocked on the door, and when he heard a shaky "enter" he was even more surprised.

"Merlin? What's going…" Arthur stopped short, shocked. He was so shocked, in fact, that his jaw literally dropped and his eyes bugged out. The last time he'd ever been this shocked was when his father told him that Morgana wasn't really his sister, but that she'd been taken into the family when Morgana's father had passed away.

Merlin was sat in front of his plant, which was looking brown and wilted, and Merlin's eyes… they were wet! When Merlin turned his head to look up at Arthur, Arthur got a better look at him. Merlin's cheeks had trails of tears running down them (whether they were salty or not wasn't understood yet). It was so shocking to see, Arthur nearly forgot to breathe.

"My—my plant," Merlin stuttered, voice cracking with a touch of static. "It—it died! My poor, innocent plant—"

"Merlin…" Arthur gasped. He tried to rein in his shock so that he could handle what the first priority was, which was Merlin's feelings over a dead plant. "I'm so sorry, Merlin. I know the plant meant a lot to you." He took a step at a time toward Merlin as he talked, and soon he had Merlin wrapped in his arms. Merlin's whole body was burning up, and it made Arthur wonder if maybe that was a connection to the sudden tears. Was his inner core heating up so much that it was actually pushing the coolant out from his eye sockets? There did seem to be a bit of steam wafting from his ears and nostrils.

"I do not understand," Merlin said into his stomach. He was still sitting. "I gave it food and water and classical music… where did I go wrong?"

It was then that Arthur understood what Merlin had overlooked. "Merlin, love," he ran his fingers through Merlin's hair. "Plants need sunlight. I thought you knew that. And thinking you knew that I thought you'd have gotten those special lights that imitate sunlight to shine on it. I'm sorry I didn't talk to you about this sooner."

"Oh," Merlin hiccupped, his voice sounding too watery, which for a robot wasn't good, and steam was puffing out of his mouth as if it were winter. "How stupid could I be? How could I have forgotten such a fundamental detail as that? My plant has paid the price for my error."

"Hey, hey, shh," Arthur went to his knees and took Merlin's hands into his. He stroked the back of them with his thumbs and leaned his forehead against Merlin's, Merlin's head bowed in his shame and sorrow. "No more tears, yeah? Here." Arthur produced a handkerchief from his back pocket. It was more or less a bandana that he sometimes used to keep the grease and things out of his hair when he worked on the ship, but he hadn't the need to use it since Merlin came on board and took over the maintenance duties. He used the corner of the red 'kerchief to wipe Merlin's face.

"Thank you, Arthur," Merlin said. His voice was small and shaky still, and if Arthur heard correctly it even sounded a bit static-y, like some of his tears had got into his electrical unit.

"Calm down, okay? It sounds like crying could make you short-circuit, and we don't want that, do we?" Arthur kept wiping at Merlin's face as he talked, their heads not bowed anymore. He produced a smile out of Merlin, but it was small and brief. When Arthur noticed the tear tracks went down Merlin's neck, and that was what had caused the majority of the sparks and steam, he wiped down Merlin's neck as well. Realizing just how nice the bandana looked around Merlin's neck like that, Arthur tied it on. It was probably stained with Merlin's impossible tears, but that didn't matter much, to either of them.

Merlin looked down, slowly placing a hand onto the bandana-cum-neckerchief. "You are… giving it to me?"

"I am," Arthur said. "Is there a problem with giving my maintenance robot the 'kerchief I used to use while I'd done maintenance?"

"No, sir, it is your decision," Merlin said, fingers still lingering on the neckerchief. "But can you actually part with it?"

"I can," Arthur said. "Especially when my dearest companion robot is strangely, and impossibly, crying. How is this even remotely possible, Merlin?" He used his thumb to lower Merlin's bottom eyelid and looked in, as if there was an answer there in Merlin's mechanical ducts. He could still see a bit of steam but that was quickly disappearing as Merlin was calming down.

Merlin blushed, shutting his eyes in his embarrassment so that Arthur couldn't look into them anymore. "I do not know it myself. It just happened when a shock of sadness went through me and I could not control it." He opened his eyes again; they were so blue and round as they stared straight into Arthur's eyes. "Is—is this what it is like to be human? I do not like not having control over such trivial things such as painful emotions. Happiness and embarrassment I have no troubles melding into my software, but sadness… the feeling of loss—grief? I do not think I can cope with such upgrades."

Arthur pulled Merlin into a hug and Merlin laid his head down into the crook of his neck, like he normally did after they'd have rigorous and satisfying sex.

"Something is definitely changing in your programming. I'll have to report it, as are my orders."

"If that is what you must do," Merlin answered softly, a pained expression on his face.

**

Nearly a week later, by e-mail, Arthur received an actual response to his report. Usually they'd only send a confirmation e-mail, letting Arthur know they had received his report and had it deposited into the records, but this time they attached a direct order with it.

Captain Arthur Pendragon always followed orders, even if he was against them. Well, normally he followed all orders, but the one he'd just received had him rebelling without much deliberation.

"Shut MERLIN down?" Arthur screamed at his monitor, as if those at Camelot Enterprise could actually hear him. "They've got to be bloody kidding! Showing human emotions shouldn't be a reason to terminate a robot's life, it should be a celebrated event! This is a big discovery, an incredible evolution in the production of synthetic human beings! Showing a little emotion shouldn't be cause for alarm."

He was wrong, however. After poring through his robotics textbooks he remembered that there'd been a robot-scare years ago when man first invented the perfect robot housecleaner. It would clean your house from top to bottom, wash dishes, do laundry, and make dinner, everything a cleaning service would have provided centuries ago. The scare was that the robots would become too human, get a mind of their own, and raise riots and go on a killing spree. The whole 'kill all humans' was a nightmare to many of the average folks, especially after the galactic war (although the robots first created for the war was a big help, many Earthlings thought it best to dismantle them and never have anything to do with them ever again).

The prejudice against robots lasted a while, but later groups of robot lovers and scientists stood up to those anti-robot leagues and won the case that robots were in no way capable of becoming human, and that they would do only what humans would program them to do. Robots were not a threat to human kind, unless the programmer had built the robot for such a purpose. Thus, robots were becoming a hot item on sale, much like a car or personal computer, and restrictions were put in place so companies wouldn't sell robots that caused harm (or else the company would be disbanded and the owner get life in prison). And even though there had been a few rogue builders and a few mishaps with robots, people generally liked (and enjoyed) robots.

But showing human emotions, such as crying or even falling in love, was a huge deal. It was a big scare, and therefore it was ordered that MERLIN be disassembled and destroyed.

Arthur couldn't do that. Not to Merlin. He'd grown too attached to him. And really, Merlin was too much of a girl's blouse to even consider going on a killing spree. (Was showing guilt and sorrow really just a step up to having anger and hatred? Arthur didn't think so.)

There was another note included in the order he had just received: that they'd send a replacement, which they considered an improved model on the MERLIN. After all, Merlin was only a prototype.

No matter how honor-bound Arthur was, and how he'd been raised and educated, he could not do as he was instructed and dismantle Merlin. He could not fathom even considering it, for it was as good as murder to him and Arthur Pendragon was no murderer.

So, he ignored his orders and went to have sex with Merlin.

**

About two and a half months later (give or take a few days), a large crate like the one Merlin had came in arrived. Arthur had been trying to ignore the situation, pretend it wasn't real, but the reality of it all came back to haunt him. The crate had letters scrawled on it, much like Merlin's had, but they weren't the same letters. The updated, improved version of Merlin's model was called GEORGE.

"Generous Emulating Official Robot Generating Egotism," Arthur read with a long face. "No, no, no… this can't be happening!"

Merlin stood by his side, shocked and almost as stricken as Arthur was. "You—you are replacing me?"

"It wasn't my idea," Arthur nearly shouted. He pulled at his hair as he paced angrily. "They wanted me to dismantle you simply because you've shown emotions that you weren't programmed to show, and that they'd send me a replacement. I didn't response back to them, like I knew I should have, to tell them to stuff their orders up their arses! I ignored the order, because I didn't like even the thought of dismantling and destroying you. It would be like killing you, and I didn't—don't—want to do that."

Merlin stopped Arthur's pacing and removed his hands from his hair to hold them, love and kindness swimming in Merlin's eyes. He was showing the same sort of emotion that caused this predicament in the first place, and it was actually a comfort to Arthur, not at all a scare.

"You really do love me, then," Merlin said, and it shocked Arthur into realizing the truth to that statement: yes, Arthur DID love Merlin! It was completely ridiculous but no less true. He would no doubt be looked at as an idiot, but many others on Earth had fallen in love (or extremely liked) their robots, so it probably wasn't anything new. Arthur was a highly educated, pragmatic man though. Falling in love with robots was something that didn't happen to people like him.

Yet he loved Merlin, with all his being.

"I do," Arthur said, voice low and gentle. He curled his fingers around Merlin's hands, which were not at all cold. "Spirits preserve me, but I do. I cannot help how I feel, Merlin. My love for you is irrational, yet it is there—like the irrational and imaginary numbers in mathematics."

"Like the unexplained forces within the universe, and the multiple universes beyond," Merlin said. "Yes, I understand. I do not understand emotions very well, but I do understand that they are, at most times, unavoidable to a degree. One cannot help how one feels."

"And you cannot help feeling these emotions, Merlin, even though you're a robot, but I know you don't have an evil circuit in your body. They don't understand that like I do." Arthur placed his hands on either side of Merlin's head and pulled him in for a sweet kiss. Merlin responded in the way he knew he would: with love and passion, and with small tears trailing down his warm, rosy cheeks.

That was when the door to the crate opened and out emerged GEORGE.

"Defective!" GEORGE cried, pointing an accusing finger at Merlin, whom had just been ending the kiss with a little swipe of his tongue along Arthur's bottom lip. "You are defective and you must be dismantled!"

"Stop!" Arthur ordered, shielding Merlin protectively with his body and holding a hand out in front of him. GEORGE obeyed, as was his programming to do, but Arthur wasn't sure just what had been put into its program that would cause Merlin harm. "You're not to touch Merlin. And I will not dismantle or destroy him either."

"That is irrational talk, sir," GEORGE said. "I am your replacement, and the MERLIN must be dismantled. He is defective, a risk to all humankind."

Arthur's nostrils flared and his eyes blazed with fierce anger and determination. With Merlin close behind him, Arthur could feel him actually shivering. It wasn't normal for a robot to be scared, for they weren't supposed to want to prolong their lives for any reason. It was in their programming to do whatever necessary to ensure the maintenance of the human existence, and not their own. Merlin was showing fear, and that too was a reason for the dismantlement of Merlin, according to the law. But Arthur won't allow it.

"He's not a risk," Arthur said, trying to keep his voice level, even though he felt angry enough to dismantle GEORGE. "He hasn't done anything to prove that he's a danger to humankind. All he's done is show sadness, love, and fear. That's not a good enough reason to have him destroyed."

"But, sir, it is the order of Camelot Enterprises that must be carried out—"

"I don't care about those orders!" Arthur snapped. "I'm ordering you to not harm Merlin, and you must obey my orders because I'm your owner."

Something in GEORGE's programming must have clicked, because the stance he'd been in changed and he stood more at attention, like a butler. He looked nearly like Merlin had when Merlin had come out of his crate, except GEORGE was looking more like a dutiful servant robot than a seductive and cheeky sex-bot.

"Sir, you must reconsider," George tried again. "If Camelot Headquarters has ordered the MERLIN to be dismantled then it should and must be carried out."

"Merlin is a prototype, and from what I understand he's also one of a kind, and I'm not about to destroy something as valuable as him."

"Value is in the eye of the beholder, sir," GEORGE said. "And for something to have such a value there must be a valuer…"

"Yes, yes, I know," Arthur snapped. "I'm merely pointing out the facts as I know it. Now, I know that you were programmed to make sure that your orders were carried out, but since I'm the only human on board the Excalibur, which I'm also the captain of, then you're to listen to my orders, understand?"

"Yes, sir, but—"

"And my orders are to leave Merlin alone. Is that understood, GEORGE?"

"But sir—"

"IS. THAT. UNDERSTOOD?"

GEORGE dithered, as if he were going through the files in his software to find something wrong with Arthur's command. Arthur could almost hear the whirling and clicking going on. Finally, GEORGE nodded slowly, his face a complete blank. A well-functioning robot did not disobey the human it was programmed to work for, and Arthur was the robot's new master. It had no choice but to obey.

"Yes, sir," it said slowly. "Understood."

**

That night (or what was considered nighttime in space), Arthur lain in bed with Merlin, arms around him. Merlin had his head on Arthur's chest and he could feel Merlin shivering very minutely against him. Merlin was warm, so of course he wasn't cold (robots weren't effected by the cold—so it wasn't like they could freeze to death), so the only other reasoning for the shivering that Arthur could deduce was that Merlin was still scared. Of course, the small bits of tears leaking out of Merlin's eye sockets and onto Arthur's chest could be a good indicator of Merlin's fear as well.

"I won't let George hurt you," Arthur assured him. "I promise." He threaded his fingers through Merlin's hair. It was always silky soft to the touch.

They were having a rare moment of just snuggling without having sex first. Arthur didn't think he'd ever get this attached to his own sex-bot, and often wondered if he'd feel the same way toward the GWEN bot if he'd received his original order. Merlin enjoyed being with Arthur at night, so it was a rare occurrence when Merlin would sleep (power down) in his own room. That was even more proof that Merlin had actual emotion toward Arthur.

"I know you will do your best to keep me up and running," Merlin said. Anyone else would think Merlin was being his normal robotic self, but Arthur could hear the hint of sadness in his voice.

"I will," Arthur vowed. "I'll do everything in my power to keep you…"

Merlin lifted his head from Arthur's chest, and in the dim light Arthur stared into Merlin's artificial, sparkling eyes.

"Then marry me, Arthur," Merlin begged. "Marry me, and you won't have to be forced to dismantle me."

Arthur's heart thumped painfully in his chest. If he married Merlin then there was no doubt he could keep him, and Merlin would be under another law that would forbid anyone from dismantling and destroying Merlin. It would work to make sure Merlin stayed fully functional, but what would Arthur's father think?

But the more Arthur thought on it, the more it sounded like a good plan. Arthur could always ask a woman to help make him a son, maybe even pay her for it (not in a traditional way but through simulation), or he could adopt, or have his genes transfigured and split and made into another him (or close to it). There were many possibilities of having offspring other than the way nature intended.

They could even, possibly, have robot children. It was a popular craze back on Earth, or so Arthur heard via Leon in one of his last e-mails. They could have one of each: a human child and a robot child. It could work. They really did love each other, and if Arthur had felt even a smidgen different then he would have had no problems carrying out the order to disassemble Merlin. His heart, fortunately for Merlin, forbade him from even considering it.

"Arthur?" Merlin said, because Arthur'd been quiet for nearly half an hour thinking on everything since Merlin had popped the question.

Arthur looked at him and smiled. He had the answer, and he wished he'd figured it out much sooner, but he'd hadn't been sure or felt that it was right before. Now, however, he was certain of his heart on the situation, and he understood just what to do about his new-found resolve.

He rose onto one elbow and gazed down at Merlin, who kept one arm around Arthur's waist and was blinking cutely up at him as he waited patiently for Arthur's answer.

"It is tradition, is it not, to have a ring to give to the person one is proposing to?" he said.

Merlin beamed, his eyes going all misty with crystal-clear water. "It is indeed."

"And is it not also tradition to go down on one knee as well?" Arthur said, fighting a smile.

"You are right, Arthur," Merlin said, water spilling out from the corner of his eye. "You are… very correct in the traditional way of proposal among humans…"

"Then it looks like you have a ring to find."

Merlin was up and out of bed faster than he'd ever seen before. He watched in amusement and awe as Merlin ran from Arthur's chambers then down the hall to his own. Slowly, Arthur sat up and waited for his beloved to return, knowing somehow that Merlin would acquire such an engagement ring for him to wear (Merlin would most likely make one out of spare silver and other metals, and possibly a pretty stone from his space rock collection).

He then heard Merlin suddenly scream "NO!" in such an alarming way that Arthur didn't think twice and leapt from his bed. He ran to Merlin's room and went inside without a thought for his own safety.

Arthur instantly saw just what had caused Merlin's sudden distress: GEORGE was there, and Arthur saw that he got hold of Merlin's dead plant. Every room had its own waste disposal which would either recycle stuff or ground it into fine powder and have it disposed of in a proper manner, and by the looks of things Arthur deduced that George was trying to throw it in the room's disposal. Merlin was trying to rescue his dead, wilted plant from GEORGE's hands, his face scrunched up and tears flowing down his cheeks. They'd ended up in a tug-of-war situation and neither robot was willing to concede defeat, but George's expression was so uncaring and so unemotional that it hurt Arthur's heart just watching.

"Oi, what're you doing with Merlin's plant?" he demanded.

GEORGE whipped his head around to stare at Arthur, but not once did his grip on the plant slip. "It is not allowed on board the ship, sir," he answered monotonously. "And it is dead, so I was trying to dispose of it as per the rules—"

"That is Merlin's property," Arthur exclaimed. "You have no right to throw out something that does not belong to you. Now give it back to him."

"But, sir, it is not allowed on board."

"I don't care," Arthur snarled. He stalked closer in his anger, and he knew that even GEORGE could sense his displeasure. "It isn't yours to do with as you see fit. Now give it back to Merlin."

Because of his programming, George had no choice but to obey. He released the plant and it sent Merlin nearly crashing into the wall behind him, but he was able to steady himself just before the impact. George looked just as unaffected by Merlin's plight as he'd done about tossing the plant into the trash bin.

"What are you even doing in here?" Arthur asked George while Merlin cradled his dead plant, tears falling fast and hard down his cheeks. Arthur could already tell that his crying was going to cause little sparks to fly up again thanks to the puffs of steam coming from his shirt collar, so Arthur sidled over to Merlin's side without taking his eyes off George to take Merlin's neckerchief and press it to each wet cheek. Merlin understood right away, smiling slightly through the tears, and took over the job of drying his face.

"I sensed a foreign object within the vicinity and my sensors led me in here," George answered.

"So the 'foreign' object you sensed was Merlin's plant, and you decided to do away with it."

"As is my programming," George said. "Yes, sir."

"You're not supposed to just come in to someone else's room," Arthur said. "It's not allowed."

"This is true, sir, but Merlin is not human, and therefore it does not count."

"And I say it does! Merlin's going to be—he is my fiancé, so you're to treat him as such, which means he now has equal legal standing and rights aboard Excalibur as I do."

"He will only have the same legal rights as a human once he is married to you, sir," George decided to humbly clarify. "And since you are not married yet, he does not register—"

"Shut up and get out of Merlin's room," Arthur shouted. "Now! Go check on the ship's charts or something!"

"Yes, sir," George said and obeyed without a hitch. Once he'd left, Arthur consoled Merlin with an arm around his shoulders.

"Thank you, sir—er, Arthur," Merlin said. "For saving my plant."

"You're welcome, Merlin. Of course, we don't know how GEORGE sensed your plant in the first place, since it's actually dead. I thought robots could only detect life forms."

Merlin lifted the plant to eye-level and scanned it. Arthur knew that the plant must not be completely dead the moment he saw Merlin's face brightened up and his frown transformed into a smile.

"Arthur, it is not as wholly dead as I had initially feared! There is a small sprout here struggling to survive. I think there is a chance I could save it."

"That's wonderful news, love," Arthur said, and he meant it.

**

It was odd, but it seemed that ever since Merlin showed more emotion he'd become worse at cleaning, cooking, sewing, and other such manual labor. He was still good with mechanics, could set courses to the next bunch of planets or check charts, so it wasn't as if Merlin's programming was completely broken. Even if GEORGE did a lot of the charting and helped in navigating (and actually cooked better than Merlin, but Arthur wasn't about to tell Merlin that), Arthur trusted Merlin more to maintain the ship. One time, he'd seen Merlin smudged with oil and grease, tool in hand and neckerchief around his head, and it drove Arthur wild with lust while at the same time his heart overflowed with love and affection. They'd ended up in bed afterwards.

The day after the incident with the plant, Arthur had sent the news to Camelot Enterprises that he intended to marry Merlin (Merlin had indeed made a metal, non-traditional ring to give to Arthur that had a beautiful, reddish stone set in it, and he even went down on one knee and asked like a normal human would; it nearly made Arthur cry, but he held it together). They could marry via the computer (he was the captain of the ship after all) or they could have a licensed person come aboard to wed them, but he wasn't sure which he'd rather have. If they did it via computer it would feel right, since the one Arthur intended to marry was a robot. He'd like to have Leon and Lance (and maybe GWAINE) as his best men, though, and maybe Morgana and Elena as the bridesmaids, but that was only if the others would want to be present for their marriage, and if so they'd have to wait until they arrived back on Earth.

A week later Arthur received a letter in the post from Leon, and he'd written that he thought it would be best if they came back to Earth to wed, so that everyone that wanted to come to their marriage ceremony was able to. Arthur then talked it over with Merlin and Merlin agreed, cheeks glowing red and warm.

"I would like an Earth wedding," Merlin said in agreement. "There would be plants and flowers and real sunlight."

"You're right about that," Arthur said. He then kissed Merlin softly on the lips.

Merlin adored all manners of plants, flowers, and green growing things. He also liked animals. Arthur knew this because he saw Merlin looking at a book filled with pictures of animals in them one afternoon. Merlin had just finished with his maintenance job and had some time to kill, so he took up his animal picture book and flipped through it. Sometimes he'd see Merlin looking at the pages full of butterflies, of birds of paradise, and, on occasion, of colourful fish and hummingbirds. It made Arthur even more keen to grant Merlin's wish of a house of their own with as many pets as Merlin wanted, and with a big vegetable garden in the backyard.

If he hadn't known about Merlin's excessive use of tears as a sign of emotion, he wouldn't have discovered the uncalled for bullying GEORGE was doing to Merlin behind Arthur's back.

He thought at first that maybe Merlin couldn't get his plant healthy again, but it wasn't that because after Merlin had found the lamp that beamed artificial sunlight onto it and did everything he could, the plant had started to grow shoots of green again. When he'd pestered Merlin for an explanation for his tears, Merlin would just shake his head and tell Arthur that he was only being silly about something again, or that it was hard to keep his emotions about getting married to Arthur at bay. The latter he could maybe believe, but there really was something off about it all. Robots weren't able to lie to their masters, but oddly enough he'd caught Merlin lying (or more like keeping information from him) a few times.

Finally he discovered of the reason for Merlin's tears: Arthur walked onto the bridge to see how Merlin was doing with the last of the star charts (there was a good chance they'd be finished and could turn the ship back toward Earth soon), when he saw the bullying firsthand.

"You are a disgrace to the robot clan," GEORGE was saying. "You are not supposed to be human in any way… it is against everything we robots stand for. Humans will fear you if they see you cry—they will disassemble you."

"Leave me alone," Merlin said, tears streaking down his face. "Let me be so I may finish my work."

"Emotions are only used by the humans who need us. You are no human, you do not need emotions. You should not even be in love with your owner. It is not logical."

"Please, just go away!" More water trickled down from Merlin's eyes, splashing onto his jeans and the floor. Small sparks were hissing along Merlin's shirt collar and from underneath the back of Merlin's shirt which had ridden up from Merlin's crouched position on the floor, steam wisping here and there. "I'm not marrying Arthur just because he is my master and that I love him—"

"Humans are our masters, yes, and it is your duty to marry your master if he asks you. You have no choice. But all this crying nonsense just proves that you are defective. You have let it taint you—"

"Enough!" Arthur shouted. He barreled down the tier steps to the lower part of the bridge were Merlin was working and yanked GEORGE away from Merlin. "I won't have you belittling Merlin any longer. You're relieved of your maintenance duties from now on and are demoted to only servant status. And for your information, Merlin asked me to marry him, so it was my decision to say yes or no."

GEORGE didn't look angry in the least, but he did seem a little shocked to learn of how their engagement had come about. "MERLIN asked you?"

"That's right," Arthur said proudly.

GEORGE stood there for a few seconds more before turning back toward Merlin and shouting "DEFECT! DEFECT! DEFECT~!"

Arthur slammed his fist into George's face. He'd forgotten, in his anger, that although on the outside a robot had soft skin and impressive imitation muscles underneath that skin, its inside structure was like any other mechanical object. Arthur cried out in pain and held his injured hand to his chest.

Merlin was suddenly there to check the damage that he'd done to himself as GEORGE stood a few feet away from his original spot thanks to the impact of Arthur's hit, but not seemingly hurt in the slightest except that the tip of his nose was a bit askew.

"You have broken two of your fingers," Merlin said, sounding nearly like a worried fishwife crossed between a displeased nurse. He still had tears in his eyes, but they were a bit more subdued now as he focused on Arthur. "You should go to the infirmary straight away."

"Come with me," Arthur said. "I don't want you alone with GEORGE again."

Merlin glanced over at the other robot and then back quickly to Arthur. GEORGE was only standing there, staring at them in the eeriest way he'd seen him do yet. It was somewhat creepy and worrying, but Arthur was hoping it was only his imagination and that he really had nothing to fear from this other robot.

"I will be fine, Arthur," Merlin said.

"No, I—I would rather you come with. I don't trust the medical robot hands to fix my fingers correctly. I want you do to it."

"Okay," Merlin said. "But I don't think I will do as adequate a job, because I'm programmed to fix mechanical things, not humans."

"I'm sure you'll do fine. Please, Merl, let's go." Arthur was feeling even more uncomfortable the longer they stayed near GEORGE.

"Yes, of course, sir—" Merlin said.

"And how many times must I tell you not to call me that?" Arthur sighed. Together they walked off the bridge, leaving a silent and motionless GEORGE in their wake.

***


	3. Just Who is the Disfunctional Robot Here?

"Arthur, should you be even doing that?" Merlin asked. He was leaning over Arthur's shoulder and gripping the edge of the paper star chart of the current galaxy they were recording. Although the main star charts and maps were downloaded into the ship's computer, it was customary to have a physical back-up in case something went wrong with the data (like if it got accidentally erased or there was a computer virus). They were nearly finished with the last bit of the final unknown star cluster in this part of the universe, and a couple broken fingers weren't going to stop Captain Arthur Pendragon.

"I'm quite capable of making dots and lines while my fingers are in a splint and cast, thanks ever so much," Arthur replied. 

"You also need to write down names and dates," Merlin helpfully reminded him. "Which means you would need to grip the pen harder and apply more pressure…"

"Yes, yes, yes," Arthur said tersely. He tried to go back to his work, but Merlin stopped his hand. He let out a long, put-upon sigh. "Merlin."

"Allow me, Arthur. You should go rest. I will take care of everything. Besides, I'm faster at charting than you."

"That's because you're a robot," Arthur said through gritted teeth. He hated having any kind of handicap, especially if it hindered him from doing his work properly. But he supposed that was what Merlin was there for: to do the majority of the work. Sighing, Arthur relented and let Merlin take the paper chart from him. "All right then; do it. Just be sure that you do a better job of it than you had with my shirt."

Merlin blushed from the memory of accidentally putting a hole straight through Arthur's second best shirt. It had happened last night, after GEORGE finished washing all of Arthur's clothes and dumped them on Arthur's bed without a word and then left. Merlin had been so distraught by the other robot's attitude toward him and the way that he'd treated Arthur's clothes that Merlin wasn't paying attention to what he'd been doing and suddenly there was a lot of smoke and a hole burnt right through the shirt. Merlin sorrowfully apologized for ruining it, tears streaming down his face, but Arthur wasn't angry; he was more worried for Merlin's condition than a piece of cloth.

Ever since Arthur had punched GEORGE square on the nose, George hadn't said a word to either of them. It was a bit off-putting, but there wasn't anything he could do about it. Arthur thought maybe it was just George's way of sulking or something similar. When GEORGE first started with the cleaning, he used to do everything and left Merlin with very little. Merlin actually complained about it, teary-eyed and all, so Arthur had asked George to allow Merlin to do some of the cleaning chores as well. Arthur didn't know what was said between the two robots (or if any communication took place), but he had a feeling that GEORGE decided to let Merlin take care of the ironing. Basically, Merlin took care of a lot of things that had to do with Arthur's room. Merlin was pleased to get some of his serving jobs back, but it was then discovered that Merlin's ability in housekeeping was not as on par as it had been. Arthur didn't mind so much, although he knew he should because he'd grown up with such a well-to-do family, but he was getting rather tired of everything being so tidy and perfect, so a little disorder in his life actually made things a lot less mundane.

"I will do the charts perfectly," Merlin said. "As I always do. Now go and rest."

"I just don't want to leave you alone with…" Arthur glanced around the archive room. "With You-Know-Who."

"I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself, Arthur," Merlin said. "You had ordered him to leave me alone, so he will. He won't break protocol and start pestering me again."

"I hope not, for his sake. If he ever does bother you in any way, let me know. I won't have him make you cry so much you end up rusting your innards."

"Impossible, sir. I am made of more than just iron and steel. I'm also made of plastic, silicon, latex, silk, fibre glass, rubber…"

"Yes, I know what you're made of. I did take advanced robotics."

"If you knew, then why did you say--?"

"I was making a joke," Arthur sighed. "Never mind. We both know you don't rust, but you would probably short-circuit if you weren't careful."

"I'm very careful," Merlin said, holding up the end of his neckerchief. "I use this for more than wiping grease from my face."

Arthur smiled, still secretly pleased that Merlin always wore his bandana around his neck. Perhaps he should find others for him, but of different colours. Perhaps as a gift. He could order for some online and they'd probably arrive just before the date of Merlin's Activation Day (which would be similar to a human's birthday). Imagining the pleased look on Merlin's face would be something to treasure.

That evening when GEORGE still wouldn't speak to him, Arthur decided to crack open his old robotics textbook again to see if he could figure out the cause. Two hours later, and he'd made no progress. There were no notes or any mentions of a robot losing his or her ability to speak after being punched on the nose. What was even weirder, Arthur noticed, was that GEORGE never even tried to fix his nose. Normally, whenever a robot had such an injury they would automatically get themselves repaired, because not being in perfect working order was out of the question for servant bots. Something was definitely going on, and whatever it was Arthur didn't like it.

He kept Merlin close because of it, and rarely would he leave Merlin out of his sight. He tried to keep him close at night whenever he could, which wasn't too out of the ordinary, but it still felt better to have Merlin in his arms than not. And even if they didn't have any sex, and it confused Merlin a little that he wasn't asking for any, Merlin still obeyed his order to stay in bed with him. Arthur wasn't sure if that was just something in his programming or because of his feelings toward Arthur. Either way, he was grateful.

**

The next morning, after Arthur got showered and dressed, he went down for his usual breakfast.

The smell coming from the kitchen wasn't normal. Curious, but cautious, Arthur entered the dining area to find GEORGE standing next to the table, which wasn't unusual, and his plate of food in the usual spot. There was something off about the way his breakfast looked, however. Normally, his food looked absolutely scrumptious and he could barely wait to dig in. Now, though…

Arthur gingerly sat down. "George… what is this?" he poked his fork in the middle of what should be eggs, but it cracked and flaked instead of what eggs were supposed to do when you poked them.

"Breakfast, sir," GEORGE said, which was the first thing he said to Arthur since he punched George's face in. If Arthur had been paying attention, he would have detected a slight flux in George's voice box.

"This is not breakfast. This looks more like stuff from the disposal bin."

"It is breakfast, sir." GEORGE said in his usual, eerie monotonous tone.

"Clearly it isn't." Arthur said, pushing the plate away. "My breakfast is not supposed to be this black or charred, unless this is some new variety of eggs, toast, and bangers I don't know about. Actually, I doubt I should eat any of this. Take it away and make me a brand-new plate."

Without a word, George did as asked. As Arthur sat there and waited for George to make him the correct kind of breakfast, he opened the Universal Daily to read the sport pages and then, after finding the score of the football team he was searching for, he slowly lifted his cup of tea to his lips. The second he sipped, he gagged and spit it out. "This is not tea!"

"It is, sir," George said as he emerged from behind the kitchen door with another plate of food. Arthur looked up and noticed black smoke rising from the top of the doorway. George set the new plate down in front of him. "Here is your new breakfast, sir."

Arthur breathed in deeply to calm himself, and then let out a long, exasperated sigh. He pinched the bridge of his nose and said, "George, that is the same damn breakfast you just gave me."

"It is your breakfast, sir."

"It is not!" Arthur stood and shoved his teacup in George's face. "And this is not tea! I thought you knew how to brew me the perfect cup?"

"That is your tea, sir."

"IT IS N--!" Arthur just stopped himself from screaming and tried to calm down. It would not do to lose his temper now, because he didn't know what he'd do to George if he did (and punching George in the face again wouldn't be a smart idea, considering his fingers were still on the mend). He took a few deep breaths and tried again. "Look, you know and I know that this is not tea."

"It is tea, sir—"

"It tastes like bath water!" Arthur growled. "And I know for a fact that that is not how tea is supposed to taste. And this," he waved a hand at the plate, "is not my usual breakfast. It isn't even food! It's just… charred flakes and mush. Now either you make me what I normally eat, and make another good pot of tea, or I'll ban you from the kitchen!"

George looked as if he were about to say something, but then his face twitched and he moved with slight jerks as he gathered up the plate of burnt food and the teacup and went back into the kitchen.

When George returned for the third time, it was with the very same things: breakfast burnt to a crisp and barely edible, with tea that tasted of soap.

"George—" Arthur growled in frustration.

"Breakfast, sir."

"Oh, for the love of—MERLIN!"

Merlin arrived a few moments later, George still standing by the table looking as if he were the perfect waiter. "Yes, Arthur?" Merlin asked, wiping some oil from his hands with a rag.

Arthur looked at the emotionless robot. "George, you may go now. Merlin will serve me."

George obeyed, and then crashed the left side of his body into the side of the archway as if drunk before he found his way out, twitching slightly.

"Merlin, could you please make me breakfast?" Arthur asked.

"But I thought that was George's job," Merlin said, stuffing his oily rag into his back pocket, and damn if that still didn't make Merlin desirable. Arthur nearly decided to skip breakfast all together and take Merlin to bed, but his stomach had other plans.

He gestured at the plate of so-called food. "Does this look like he was doing his job?"

Merlin stared incredulously at the charred breakfast. "George made you… this? But this is unpalatable."

"Which is why I want you to make me breakfast. In fact, you can do all the cooking again from now on. I'm banning George from the kitchen, too."

"Oh, but, I thought you didn't like—"

"Compared to this," Arthur pointed down at his plate, "your stuff is heavenly."

Merlin blushed, lowering his head in humble gratitude. "I will make you a plate right away, after I clean up." He turned toward the door to the kitchen, plate and teacup in hand.

"Don't forget to make me new tea!" Arthur called after him.

Merlin turned back around, smiled and said, "Milk first, of course."

"Of course," Arthur smiled.

**

The rest of the day went on as normal, except for GEORGE becoming a mime again (thankfully not the kind that pretended to be inside an invisible box or walked against invisible wind). Arthur wasn't sure if it was a good or bad thing, because there was definitely something wrong with the servant bot.

That night, Merlin decided to power down in his own room, to give Arthur some space. Arthur worried, of course, but Merlin assured him that he'd be fine. He'd even lock the door with extra security measures taken. Arthur kept his door unlocked just in case Merlin needed him or he needed Merlin, for whatever reason.

So he set his alarm for eight o'clock; knowing that Merlin was safely locked in his own room, he relaxed and allowed himself to start drifting off. In fact, he was nearly in dreamland when he thought he heard the door slide open and close. First thought was that Merlin decided to stay with him after all, and so Arthur was about to lift up the covers to let him in, but when he cracked open his eyes he got a completely different looking robot standing by the bed.

Arthur jumped nearly a foot, screeched… no, squeaked—er, gasped loudly. "GEORGE? W-w-what are you--?"

George didn't reply immediately, as if he had to actually think about why he was in Arthur's room, and finally said, "On the absence of your normal companion bot, I offer up my services to—"

"No, no—not necessary, George, thank you," Arthur said very quickly and in one breath. "I don't need… that sort of thing tonight, I'm good."

"Sir," George stepped closer, his own eyes glowing yellow in the near darkness and casting his upper half perfectly. "I am not just a servant bot. I have been programmed to help in all areas of—"

"Yes, yes," Arthur said tersely. "I understand, but you do remember that Merlin is my fiancé, yes? That means that I'm having sex only with him. So, please," he made a shooing gesture. "Just go. I need my sleep."

George didn't move for a while, and Arthur heard a slight clicking noise, as if the robot was debating on whether what Arthur said was an order or he was just being silly and that of course Arthur needed a good rodgering by another companion bot. Arthur was nearly ready to shout for Merlin, but then remembered that in Merlin's powered down state he wouldn't hear him anyway. Arthur scooted over to the other side of the bed to get ready to jump out and either help George find his way out the door, or run to Merlin's room and stay there, where it was apparently much safer than his own which was now being inhabited by a suddenly sex-craving and creepy robot.

"The stress which you are experiencing may be due to an imbalance of hormones, and I could help with—"

"No, there are NO hormone imbalances going on here," Arthur nearly shouted. "Just sleep deprivation. Now leave and let me sleep!"

"Sir, it is imperative that you receive—"

"If I need a good fuck I'll ask Merlin. Now please, GO AWAY!"

George stepped forward resolutely, most likely about to say something more, when the door opened again. In that moment, Arthur was so relieved he could weep from the sheer joy of it.

"Merlin! Oh, thank goodness," Arthur sighed. George slowly turned around and was suddenly in fighting stance, and Arthur was afraid George actually would attack Merlin so he went straight to Merlin. "I'm so very glad—" he embraced Merlin, who seemed strangely quiet. Arthur pulled back to look at his face better. "Merlin?"

Merlin's eyes were lit up like they normally were when it was dark, but they looked almost blank—lifeless, as if Merlin had suddenly become blind. But that was ridiculous; robots didn't go blind unless something really bad happened to their sight sensors. Arthur waved a hand in front of Merlin's face, but there was no reaction. Frightened that maybe George did something to Merlin, like make him some sort of robot vegetable, Arthur shook Merlin to try regaining his senses back, even if he knew that wouldn't really work—unless Merlin was sleepwalking, which was another oddity. Arthur's heart was in his throat and his stomach dropped when Merlin's demeanor didn't changed.

"Oh, stars above, what happened to you?" Arthur whispered in horror.

Then suddenly, Merlin's hand came up to grasp Arthur's bicep, startling Arthur so much he actually jumped. Fuck, this was just like being in some weird horror film!

Merlin then moved around Arthur to get in front of him and held out a hand, palm faced out. Arthur felt it was best just to go along with whatever Merlin was up to, so he stayed behind Merlin as he did his little possessive thing toward the other robot.

"Must… protect," Merlin said in a very uncanny and mechanical voice. The light coming from his eyes changed from its soft blue to a bright gold. Then there was a clicking noise and a small compartment from the palm of Merlin's hand opened up and out came a small, cylinder-like tube. It looked similar to a small cannon. "Protect master," Merlin was still saying, stepping closer to George. "Must… protect Arthur… my master… protect…"

"—I will let you sleep, sir," George said, and then quickly left the room.

"Now that was something," Arthur said, still feeling a little shaken up from the strange ordeal, but relieved all the same. "GEORGE actually did something smart for a change." Arthur then moved around to the front of Merlin as Merlin lowered his arm and said, "Danger averted, situation is now normal."

Arthur took hold of Merlin's face, Merlin's eyes changing back to blue with a gentle blink. "Merlin—are you awake? That was wonderful, really, but I wasn't in any danger. It was just George being insufferable and… Merlin? Did something ha—oh."

Slowly, Arthur remembered from robotics class that all robots had a built in mechanism inside them that automatically turned on whenever it sensed that their master was in danger, and it forced the robot to react even if it had been powered down—which was actually more like a catnap than actual sleep. The defense mechanism was much stronger in Merlin than he thought possible though, because sensing Arthur's uncomfortable nature (or whatever danger he'd been in, if he had been in any at all) from all the way across the hall and inside a locked room was really extraordinary, and just plain wonderful.

"It is possible that you're my hero this night, Merlin," Arthur said, and then surged forward to give Merlin a sweeping kiss. "Thank you."

There was a clicking noise, and then life filled Merlin's eyes again. He blinked, stared in shock at Arthur, and said, "Oh, Arthur… what happened? I thought I had sensed some sort of danger and… what am I doing in your room?"

"You don't remember?" Arthur said, shocked. "George was just in here, thinking I needed to have sex with him, or something, and luckily you came in—your defense mechanism had been turned on and you were trying to protect me."

"Oh," Merlin said again. His eyes blinked slowly, taking in the information Arthur gave him. "I thought I had imagined it. Lately I've been having odd dreams. Ever since you had defended me against GEORGE, actually. I kept having these strange images in my head while powered down that George has something horrible planned for you. Maybe I was sleepwalking as I was dreaming."

"I don't know," Arthur said. He was even more confused now than he was before Merlin told him all of that. "Robots don't normally dream, Merlin. That's what we learn in advanced robotics, anyway. Have you really been having dreams—or visions? That's utterly fantastic! …Although I don't know if I should report it; it might just cause even more panic at headquarters."

"Yes, best not to mention my dreams," Merlin agreed. "But it seems to me, my dearest husband-to-be, that I would need to stay in here with you, just in case George really is up to something. I don't think my sudden ability to dream is a coincidence. He actually might have something diabolical planned for you."

"That's absurd. Even if he were malfunctioning in some way, he would never actually harm his human master. It's not in his programming."

"That's true, Arthur, but you did break his nose. And just like on a human, the nose is connected to the brain, in a way."

"Yes, so?" Arthur couldn't connect with Merlin's logic right now, he was too tired to cope. He really needed sleep.

"So, you may have accidentally damaged his main central processing unit—his mind. Because you're not following protocol to the letter, and are not dismantling me as per your orders, and are marrying me and having me do most of the chores again so that he isn't busy enough, his programming may have become warped. He may have been planning to harm you when he came in here, and when you woke up and saw him he picked the most logical explanation as to why he was in your room while you were sleeping."

Arthur shivered, mostly out of revulsion. It had nothing to do with what just almost happened. Well, generally. "If you're right, Merlin, then we need to dismantle him."

"As per the rules, Arthur, we can't," Merlin said. "Unless Camelot Enterprises orders it so, I'm afraid we're stuck with a defective robot on board."

"Then I'll have to send a report about it to let them know. I'm sure my father will agree to have GEORGE dismantled and shipped off to be reprogrammed."

Merlin nodded in understanding, and lowered his eyes. Arthur saw them glance over at the bed.

"You're welcome to stay," Arthur said softly.

"It might be best, under the circumstances," Merlin said. He looked up and their eyes met. Arthur smiled and Merlin smiled back.

"Yeah," Arthur said. "It might be best."

**

In the morning, Arthur got an incoming message from a nearby Starship.

It was actually unexpected since he thought he was the only Camelot Starship in this part of the galaxy. The worst scenarios popped into his head as to why the other Starship was there, hailing him. Maybe he was under arrest for not following orders. Certainly it wasn't because he decided to marry Merlin. Or maybe they were there to pick up GEORGE, which would be a relief. He'd actually thought about tricking GEORGE into going in the airlock that morning and then releasing the valve that opened the hatch which would suck GEORGE into outer space. He didn't, however, because it would still feel like murder to him.

Arthur ran onto the bridge, sat in his captain's chair, and switched on the visual screen. The moment he saw the face of his old comrade from Starfleet University, a smile unbiddenly formed on his face.

"Lance! It's a pleasure to see you again, mate."

"I'm very pleased to see you as well, Captain Pendragon. It's been years. I see that you are well."

"I'm well enough, if you call having to contend with two irrational robots well."

"Irrational?" Lance asked.

"We'll go into that later. There's quite a bit to tell; it's been a very eventful year for me, since getting my robots."

"Okay, we'll talk about it later then; but speaking of robots," Lancelot said leisurely, but with unbound glee. "I decided to get myself one."

"I didn't figure you the type, Lance old boy," Arthur said with a small smile. "You were always the kind of person that wouldn't let even a mechanical arm iron your underwear. And even if you did get a robot you might end up confusing the poor thing because you would do all the chores yourself and leave none for it."

Lancelot laughed. "Well, I'm still all about robot freedom and rights, but it doesn't hurt to have one as a companion."

Arthur's eyes widened. "No way…" he squeaked out, because the thought of even straight-laced Lancelot du Lac with a companion robot (which was the politer name for a sex bot) was unheard of. Although he shouldn't be too surprised that his good mate would choose a robot over a human; Lancelot was very progressive in almost everything, including the Earth's environment and animal rights. "You and a robot… together?"

"Don't look so shocked, Arthur," Lancelot said with a grin. "When I first ordered for my companion bot I wasn't even considering going to bed with it. I just wanted a robot as a friend, someone I could talk to and confide in and who would listen and give advice. It was going in that direction, anyway, at first. But then—I don't know what happened. Somewhere along the way, Gwen and I—well… we fell in love."

"Oh, well that's to be—hang on," Arthur stood from his seat, so shocked he could barely spit the words out. "Did you say… GWEN?"

"Yeah, that's the model I got. You see, there was this mix up."

Arthur got a funny feeling about this. "A—a mix up?"

"Yeah," Lancelot continued. "I just wanted a mate. You know, a friend. Another guy to be pals with. So I ordered for the MERLIN prototype. It seems there was some misunderstanding because they sent me a GWEN instead."

"Crikey," Arthur's mouth hung open. "That's—"

"Strange? Yeah. I've heard they don't make those kinds of mistakes with your orders. Not the robot company that I ordered from anyway. What was the name of that company again?" Lancelot hummed and tapped a finger on his bottom lip as he tried to remember.

"Dragon Cave International?" Arthur softly guessed.

"Yeah, that's the one," Lancelot smiled. "That's where you got your robot from, right? But I'm sure that they'd never screw up the great Captain Arthur Pendragon's order." He laughed.

"Actually, Lance, there's something you should know…" Arthur reached over, pushed the intercom button and said into the speaker, "Merlin? Could you come to the bridge? There's something I want to show you."

"I'll be right there, Arthur," came the reply.

"Merlin?" Lancelot gasped. Now it was his turn to be shocked.

Arthur smiled, feeling more amused about the whole thing now rather than flummoxed. "I think you'll find this interesting…"

**

"Well, hello there, MERLIN," Lancelot said from the view screen. As usual, he was all smiles and pleasantries. The typical Lancelot du Lac Arthur had always known since that first meeting at Uni. Arthur had been cramming for a midterm exam for his robotics class and Lance was a tutor. He was the only other person Arthur knew to be good with robots besides himself and Leon. Lancelot then met Leon through Arthur and since then the three of them had hung out as much as possible, even outside of school. It was good to know that Lance hadn't changed too much since they'd finished Uni.

"Hello," Merlin replied shyly. He stood on Arthur's right, trying to look like the perfect servant robot, but the nervous energy shone through and was obvious to both robotics experts. "It is a pleasure to meet you, sir."

"It's a pleasure to meet you as well. I hear you have Arthur's heart in your pocket. Well done you!"

Merlin blushed his brightest red and ducked his head.

"Lance, please," Arthur said, rolling his eyes. "It's not exactly like that… and anyway, you might cause him to overheat if you make him blush too hard."

Lancelot laughed. "I see he's capable of embarrassment. I guess you weren't joking after all when you said he was absorbing—and downloading—human emotions." The laughter suddenly died in Lance's voice and turned serious. "But, Arthur, doesn't this mean that Headquarters will want you to dismantle Merlin? There will be a robot scare again if word gets out."

"Yeah, about that…" Arthur told Lancelot about what happened: about Merlin's plant that was sent to him by a robot friend called GWAINE and Merlin's reaction to it dying, about the order he got from Camelot Enterprises to dismantle Merlin and then ignoring the order, and about suddenly receiving a new robot that was meant to replace Merlin, whom Arthur didn't want, named GEORGE—and finally he told Lance that he had said yes to Merlin's proposal of marriage. He figured it best not to tell him about GEORGE's behaviour just yet; he didn't want his friend to worry, which he would.

Lancelot sat there in his own captain's chair, astonished and looking a bit awed.

"You're marrying a robot, too?" he said.

Arthur blinked. "You're marrying GWEN?"

"Of course. I did say that I fell in love with her."

"Yes, but that doesn't necessarily mean marriage. Not everyone marries when they fall in love, you know. …Of course, look who I'm talking to. But being a robot activist I didn't think you'd want to even own one."

"You're the one doing something out of character, Arthur," Lancelot reminded him. "I never pegged you for someone who'd fall for their own robot."

"You're right. Normally I wouldn't even dream of it, but now—" Arthur shook his head and then shrugged. "I just can't help how I feel. Besides, if I marry Merlin then I won't have to dismantle him."

"Ah," Lance said. He nodded and a slight smile played on his lips. "Very clever, Arthur. You still might get some backlash for it, though. Are you ready to face such an ordeal once you get to Earth?"

Arthur reached over and took Merlin's hand into his. "Just let them try tearing me away."

**

Since it had been a while since Arthur had seen Lance, they made plans to visit each other's ships. Both of them were captains, Lance having just made his captaincy two years after Arthur, so they were both in the same boat when it came to rules and regulations: meaning they both didn't have a crew yet. Their exploration of the universe was like the final test in getting their own Starfleet crew, to see if they were worthy of their titles. Their ships weren't too different, except for a few minor details. Arthur's starship was called Excalibur, Lancelot's was called Pridwin. Arthur's ship was gold and red, with touches of beige colours. Lance's ship was blue and silver, with soft colours to match. The looks of their bridges were the same, expect for the colours, and their robots were of the opposite sex.

Lancelot opted that he and GWEN come over first, to meet with him and Merlin. Arthur thought that was a good idea, and then they could go over to Lance's ship. In order to beam someone from the ship one person, or robot, had to stay behind. Lance had two robots, same as Arthur, so one of the bots stayed behind to work the controls (apparently named ELYAN, a brother of GWEN's) while the other two stood on the transportation platform. When they arrived on Excalibur's bridge, Arthur and Lancelot embraced like long lost brothers. Arthur was pleased to see Lance again and not just because he had missed his friend, but because it had been years since he'd had any kind of human touch. For Lance it was the same, so their hug lasted more than what was appropriate.

GWEN was a very polite, sweet robot. Arthur couldn't tell if anything about her was different, like it was for Merlin. GWEN curtsied with her maid outfit (which was more of a puffed out skirt than the kind that clung), bowing her head a little, and said, in a very pleasant tone, "A pleasure to make your acquaintance, Captain Pendragon."

"Nice to meet you too," Arthur said. "This is my robot—er, servant… no, I mean, this is Merlin. He's my serving bot, but he's also my fiancé. He's the robot I received instead of you, which I had ordered for."

"I see, sir," Gwen said. Then she came right up to Merlin, almost an inch away from him, and held out a hand. "Hello, M.E.R.L.I.N.—nice to meet you."

Arthur saw the slight change in Merlin's demeanor when GWEN introduced herself to him. It was odd, in a way, to see how personal space wasn't a big deal to the robots (some humans don't consider it a big deal either, but on the whole most humans liked a bit more breathing room than what the robots were giving each other, unless there was kissing or hugging in the plan). Merlin nodded minutely in that small breathing space they had, and shook her hand.

"It is a pleasure to meet you as well, G.W.E.N. I congratulate you on your betrothal to your master."

"Likewise, MERLIN. Perhaps, if we are lucky, we will occupy the same Starship when one of our masters earns his loyal crew."

"Maybe Captain du Lac could become Arthur's second in command, that way we could see each other almost every day."

"That sounds lovely," GWEN said, smiling softly. "Then we could share the maintenance and housekeeping jobs."

"Perfect. I could then have another robot to talk with that isn't trying to find a way to dismantle me."

"You spoke a contraction. You are indeed the superior robot in all things human. I have a lot to learn from you. You could be my teacher in the manners of men."

"You flatter me, GWEN," Merlin flushed. "I don't know human beings well enough to be considered an expert, but I could teach you a few things I had learned along the way."

"I would like that, MERLIN… and I like you, a lot. We could, perhaps, be friends."

"I would very much like to be your friend, GWEN." Merlin beamed, eyes misting over.

"Right," Arthur said, clapping Merlin on the shoulder. "Now that that's settled, I believe we have a starship to visit." Arthur led them all to the transportation room, where they could zap themselves from one ship to another or whatever the destination was. Arthur hadn't needed to use it, since he hadn't found a planet like Earth to explore yet, so he felt a bit anxious in actually getting to use it.

Before they could place themselves on the right spots on the transporter, Merlin asked, "Are you sure you should go without me? What if George gets wind of this?"

"I'm sure it's fine," Arthur said. "I made him do the laundry and ironing, so he should be busy for at least an hour, maybe more. Our visit should be less than that. Okay, Merlin, beam us over to Lancelot's ship."

With a sad nod, Merlin obeyed. He flipped the few necessary buttons that would activate the transporter and then put in the correct coordinates for Lancelot's ship. Merlin and Arthur shared one last, sweet look before Merlin pulled the last switch. The oval-shaped indents on the floor where they were standing lit up and in almost the blink of an eye, they were gone.

Well, not gone from vision. Merlin looked up at the view screen and saw them materialize safely onto the other starship. He saw the other robot there too, Elyan, greeting Arthur aboard the Pridwin. If only George hadn't started to malfunction and they could trust him then Merlin would be there with Arthur, meeting Elyan and seeing the inside of the other ship, instead of having to stay behind to work the controls. Merlin sighed in longing, an emotion he knew shouldn't be in any robot's programming but could not help feeling.

"Nice to meet you, Elyan," Arthur was saying from the vision screen, shaking the other robot's hand.

"A pleasure to meet you as well, Captain Pendragon," ELYAN replied.

"Please, just call me Arthur."

Before Arthur even thought about looking up into Pridwin's view screen to see Merlin watching him, Merlin was taken by surprise from behind. An electric shock, none like Merlin had ever felt, surged through his body, and before Merlin knew what was happening, he was out like a light. Inside his mind, where his memories were stored and processed, something akin to a rewind button had been pressed somehow, and suddenly his past was paying him a visit, in dreamland.

***


	4. The Power of Nature

_One year ago, in a robot workshop on Camelot Enterprises:_

Awareness flashed through his circuits, data and programs and functions were booted up and running through his microchips and processors. He opened his eyes, taking in light and forms, ears awakening to sounds, and everything clicked into place. He was fully functional, awake, and staring straight at his maker.

"Good morning, MERLIN. How do you feel?" the old human, his maker, asked.

"G-good morning, sir. I am… functioning at full capacity and ready to serve. I am, however, missing some information in my data banks…"

"Yes, I'll take care of that, my boy," his maker said. He fiddled around on a table full of papers and books, found a pair of eyeglasses, and put them on. Then he found what he was looking for and went back over to Merlin. "This might help… here you are." He quickly uploaded the last bits of the information that Merlin had needed in order to work and then closed the little door on his chest, right where a human heart would be located.

"Thank you, sir," Merlin said, now able to understand how to move his arms and elbows, legs and knees. "You are my maker?"

"Indeed I am," he said, confirming Merlin's speculation. "My name's Dr. Gaius Pennyworth. I'm the main robot creator that works for Dragon Cave International, and we're funded by Camelot Enterprises. They're one of our most prominent buyers of all things robotic, and I would be out of a job if it weren't for the owner. Now then, do you know what type of robot you are, MERLIN?"

"Affirmative," Merlin answered. "I am a serving bot that serves humans in all manners of comfort. I cook, clean, do the washing up, tidy, and provide the best luxury imaginable. I am also knowledgeable in all things sexual and understand the emotions all humans have."

"Excellent!" Gaius beamed. "There's just one little thing that I need to program you to do. You see, you're a special case, MERLIN. The owner of Dragon Cave International has requested that you also be downloaded with the functions of maintaining a Starship. He wants you to go into outer space, my boy."

"A Starship robot?" Merlin said. "Me? That is… a real honor, sir."

"It is indeed," Gaius said. "Now, come over here and lie down. It will be much simpler for me to get at the core of your data bank at the back of your head. You're much taller than I originally planned you to be."

"Yes, master," Merlin said, and obeyed his maker. He lied flat on the cot, just barely fitting. Gaius then turned Merlin's head to the left so he could get at the small catch at the back of Merlin's head. He prodded a bit, Merlin jerking as if it had tickled, and then a little door swung open to show just a taste of what was inside the MERLIN bot. Gaius located the area he needed easily, and carefully started to add the maintenance chip along with the others.

There was a table full of vials and glass jars and tubes, like a regular chemistry set, next to the cot. Inside one of the glass vials contained a compound that was meant to help certain humans that did not have much empathy for others. It was supposed to be a new breakthrough in science which would help curb crime in the big cities (not technically cure, but hopefully curb). Gaius had almost perfected the formula and although it was only meant for humans, he'd had the thought of somehow incorporating it into robots, so that they could feel human emotions as well as understand them. But of course there was the big robot scare to consider, and Gaius knew that if he even tried to make a robot more human it might ruin his career and earn him some jail time. So, he'd kept his thoughts to himself. He hadn't even written anything down lest it incriminate him.

So as he finished inserting the maintenance chip, making sure everything was aces inside Merlin, Gaius' cat – Hunith - jumped onto the table and knocked over the empathy vial. Gaius started, gasped, as the liquid splashed onto his wrist and fingers, running down the work table and soaking the cot's mattress. Reflexively, Gaius shut the little flap on the back of Merlin's head so that none of the liquid contained in the vial got in. It was very possible, though, that some had.

"Now look what you've done!" Gaius yelled at his cat. "Must you make of mess of things while I'm working? Shoo, shoo!"

Hunith meowed sorrowfully and bounded away.

When Gaius realized just what had been inside the vial that got tipped over, he was furious. As he ranted and raved, threatening to get rid of Hunith because she'd been nothing but a bother ever since he'd adopted her, Merlin sat up from the cot and got down. He stared with confusion at his maker as he continued to storm around the lab, swearing and tearing at his hair. When Gaius turned around in his anger, shouting, Merlin flinched and backed away, looking hurt—looking almost as if Gaius were angry with him.

"I am sorry, sir—master. Please do not be upset."

All the anger and fight went out of Gaius. "Oh. I'm sorry, my boy. I didn't mean to startle you. I'm just so furious that my formula, which I had spent years working on, is ruined. And it almost ruined your circuits, if it had splashed in. You may be waterproof on the outside, but you're definitely not waterproof on the inside. Not in your circuits at least."

"I am fine, sir. See?" Merlin moved his arms and legs and head around. "I am working just fine. I feel very well, sir." Merlin then smiled with a little blush, which wasn't really too alarming, but should have given Gaius pause for thought. As it so happened, it didn't.

"Well, good. That's good." Gaius sighed and dragged a hand down his face. "At least there's some good news today. Now then, we must go report to Mr. Kilgharrah, the owner of Dragon Cave International. He'll want to know that you're awake and fully functional."

"Yes, sir."

It wasn't until after Gaius left Mr. Kilgharrah's office when he realized that Merlin had actually reacted to Gaius' anger, just like a human would.

**

MERLIN had been somewhat confused by Mister John Kilgharrah. He was an interesting man, very old, and quite eccentric. He had told Merlin he was the other side of someone else's coin, which didn't make much sense to Merlin; he was a humanoid robot, not a type of currency. But when Kilgharrah explained that the other half of his coin was someone else, it made a bit more sense, but not much. MERLIN was then told he was special, one of a kind, and was meant for a great destiny for all robot-kind.

Kilgharrah might be something like a God to robots, but that didn't mean his knowledge of the future was possible. One could make predictions in the scientific sense, but it didn't make the person a soothsayer. Merlin pronounced the man one banana shy a fruit basket and decided to humor him. If what Mr. Kilgharrah was saying was true, though, and that he was deemed to be someone else's "other half" then Merlin could only hope that he find the other side of his coin soon. He had heard that prototypes normally don't have very long lives.

**

Day five, Merlin was just getting used to everything and how things ran at Camelot Enterprises when he spotted the boss.

Uther Pendragon was rather shrewd and knowledgeable of all things to do with outer space and starships (not to mention businesses), and one did not want to cross him lest they find themselves out of a job. He was yelling at some lower ranked officer that was carrying a strange green object in a clay pot. Merlin inched closer to the nearest corner by the hall they were standing in, a few feet away from Uther and the other person, and listened in.

Merlin had no idea why he was curious about the going-ons of humans, he just was. Normally robots didn't care about humans' issues and problems, but something about this conversation intrigued him (and intrigue wasn't a robot feeling either). Also, there was something about that green object that the human officer was holding. It made Merlin wonder.

"You know the rules," Uther was yelling. "No plants are allowed at Headquarters! We must preserve everything for the survival of the human race! Now get that plant out of here or I'll have it burned!"

"Yes, sir," the officer said sadly. As the officer walked passed Merlin, Merlin couldn't help but stare after him and what he'd been carrying in his arms. A plant… that was what that green growing thing was? Why didn't he have information on such things in his data banks? He must look it up.

So Merlin went to the only place he knew where to go to look up information he didn't know: the library.

"What are you doing here, MERLIN?" Sir Geoffrey, the librarian, asked. "Did Gaius send you?"

"No, sir. I am on my own today. I was wondering… I wish to look up information on plants."

"Plants?" Sir Geoffrey scratched at his white beard. "Dear me, why would you, a robot, want information on plants? You should not care either way about them."

"Oh, well… you see, sir, I just saw someone carrying a plant and so I was wondering what exactly it was, because I have no information about it in my data bank. I just wish to understand, that is all, sir." It wasn't a lie (because robots were programmed not to lie to their superiors), but it wasn't the complete truth either; it was merely withholding information. So on that account, he wasn't doing anything wrong or going against his programming at all. Merlin was sure he wasn't, anyway; it was a little hard to tell.

Geoffrey dithered, stroked his chin beard some more, hummed and hawed for a while, before granting Merlin permission. He gave directions on where he could find such books and then warned him not to tell anybody about it, because if he did…

"We could both be in serious trouble. A robot isn't normally supposed to show such curiosity about things not in their programming."

"Do not fret, sir. I shall not say one word on this matter to anybody."

"Good boy, er, bot. Now go do your fast scanning and then leave just as quickly. I have to finish my work here so I can get home."

"Yes, sir," Merlin said.

He found the books he wanted and absorbed them as fast as he could into his data bank. He didn't get a chance to read everything he wanted, because about five minutes later, Uther came in. While Sir Geoffrey and Mr Pendragon talked about something—some book or magazine, Merlin didn't understand or care at the moment—he slipped out of the library without being seen.

**

It was almost a week later when he finally met GWAINE.

Merlin had been doing a defragmentation in his file storage (because of how much information he'd read and stored) and simultaneously thinking about who his first master would be and whether or not his first master would take away his virginity, so he wasn't paying attention to which door he'd opened and walked through. When he saw the other servant robot in bed with a man, Merlin stopped in confusion and shock, and just stood there not knowing whether to back out of the room slowly and quietly or to apologize for entering before knocking. But if he said anything at all, then they'd know he was there in the first place. They looked to be too absorbed in their activities to notice the rest of their surroundings.

But when the human made a noise, which was very erotic to Merlin's ears, Merlin must have made a sound in return (out of programmed impulse) because the other robot turned his head and stared straight at him. Once it was fully acknowledged that Merlin was another robot of his type, the robot that was pounding the human's arse gave Merlin a brilliant smile.

"Come to join us?" he asked Merlin.

"Oh, uh, no thanks," Merlin said. "Sorry, wrong room." The back of his neck felt warm, but thankfully his blush did not cover his entire body (he didn't want the other robot to look at him funny). Right when Merlin had spoken, the human looked behind his companion bot's shoulder and goggled at Merlin.

"Aren't you robots supposed to—UHN—have manners and—OH, fuck—knock?" the human shouted.

"I apologize, sir," Merlin said, bowing his head in deference. "I was not paying attention to which door I had opened. I shall go now and leave the two of you your privacy."

"Your master will hear about this!" the human bellowed as Merlin backed out of the room.

He thought he heard the other sex bot say something in return to the human, but Merlin was too embarrassed to even pay it any heed. Merlin's body finally gave in and a dark blush began to travel from his neck to his ears and then to his entire face. He leaned back against the wall beside the door and took a silent moment to calm down.

Fifteen minutes later, the other robot came out of the room. Merlin was still standing there, collecting himself and trying to get his mind back to some sort of normality. He looked up when the long-haired, bearded robot stepped close to him. He smelled of sex and flavoured lube.

"I did not mean to… 'embarrass' you with my inquiry," he said to Merlin, holding out a hand to shake. "I only thought you were told to involve yourself with us. The name is GWAINE. What do they call you, then?"

"MERLIN. I am, what my maker tells me, a prototype. I do more than provide sex and all the comforts of living for humans; I am also programmed to help with a Starship's maintenance." Merlin then put his hand into Gwaine's and shook it. They were standing very close, like all robots did when they had conversations and were getting acquainted with each other.

"MERLIN," Gwaine said, almost in a sensual way. "Yes, I have heard of you. Our maker speaks highly of you. You are great with your hands, he had said; really know the ropes."

Merlin blushed again, ducking his head.

"Strange," Gwaine said. "I did not know that we robots could blush in embarrassment or humiliation. Are you sure that your maintenance chip is the only one our maker added in you?"

"I am sure," Merlin said. "I do not understand why I am like this, but you should not tell anyone. I might get dismantled and reprogrammed. Possibly turned into a toaster or blender."

"And we do not want that," Gwaine agreed. He placed his hand onto Merlin's shoulder. "Well then, MERLIN, do not worry about what the human, Tristan, said. I am sure that I had talked him out of informing your master of what you had done."

"But, Gwaine, I do not have a master. I only have Gaius, our maker."

"Gaius is your only master still?" Gwaine said, as surprised as a robot was allowed. "That is peculiar. Normally right after a robot is booted up and ready to perform their tasks there is an order request for that particular robot. Had no clients contacted Gaius about you?"

"Only the owner of Dragon Cave International, and that had been back when I was first activated."

"That is quite the honour, Merlin. Robots are not normally summoned by the great Kilgharrah. He is a man that usually stays behind the scenes and has others perform the necessary duties." GWAINE then leaned in closer, almost as if he were about to kiss him. "What is he like?"

"Old," Merlin replied, blushing softly from Gwaine's near contact. "Old and… strange. He spoke in riddles."

"He is a philosophical man, then?"

"It would seem. He had mentioned… something about me finding the other side of my coin. I do not know if he meant that I will find a master or just some other robot that I will connect with." Merlin nibbled on his bottom lip in thought and then looked up at Gwaine through his long, synthetic lashes as something dawned on him. "Perhaps is it you?" he said, almost coyly.

"Me?" Gwaine said. "I do not think I am the other side of your coin, Merlin, though it is a shame. Perhaps Mr Kilgharrah was speaking of your soon-to-be master."

"Yes, it is most likely he was," Merlin sighed, a little downtrodden to hear Gwaine say that. He thought for sure that he had found the one he was meant to share everything with.

"But," Gwaine continued when he recognized the sadness in Merlin, "I could be your best friend."

The thought was not a terrible one. It wasn't unheard of for two robots to become friends, but a friendship between robots was radically different than what humans considered friendship. Robots did not work in the same standards when it came to making and staying friends with each other. For one thing, there was no turning against each other and no bad feelings toward one another. If for some reason two robots did not exactly get along they just simply did not become friends. It was also rare for the two robot friends to terminate their friendship. Once they had decided on being friends, it was for life.

Merlin knew that he could definitely stay friends with Gwaine.

"I concur," he stated. "We shall be the best of friends, then."

"Best friends," Gwaine acknowledged, putting an arm around Merlin's shoulders as a sign. He then kissed Merlin's cheek to show just the right amount of adoration he had toward his robot comrade. "To the bitter end, as the old saying goes."

Merlin blushed, nodding. "Yes, indeed. Friends until the bitter end."

And to a robot, the bitter end would be if they were ever dismantled and/or destroyed. That could take eons to happen, if they were lucky.

**

Two days later, which was the day before Merlin would get officially ordered for and sent into space, he'd been looking through a library book he'd found most interesting. Not only did it have pictures of trees and plants in it but animals as well. Robots were not supposed to feel anything like love toward anything, but that was the only way Merlin could describe his feelings toward the book: he loved it.

GWAINE found him looking at the book that afternoon. He bent over Merlin's shoulder to see what it was that had captured his friend's attention so thoroughly.

"What is it that you are so fond of in that book?" he asked.

"Plants," Merlin said. He pointed to one in particular; it had lovely big leaves and pink blossoms on it. "I like this one. It is very beautiful."

"I suppose it can be considered that," Gwaine said. He turned his head this way and that to see what it was that made the plant so alluring to his friend, but he couldn't figure it out. "If one liked plants. Myself, I do not see the attraction."

"I like plants," Merlin said, smiling a little. "I like plants very much, especially these very colourful ones called flowers." He turned a few pages to show a couple pictures of flowers that were red, pink, white, yellow, blue, and purple. Merlin's eyes specifically went to the pink and red ones. "Are they not quite pleasing to the optical sensors? See how this one has a long pistil? Or is that a stamen? I must look these things up and store them in my data banks as soon as possible."

"I have heard of robots having hobbies sometimes, but this is the strangest hobby I have seen any robot have." Gwaine sat on the empty chair that was next to Merlin. "Best be careful, my friend. They may terminate you if they discover this love you have for plants. It is most unfounded for you to have such feelings for something like plants and flowers, since it is not in your programming."

"I will be careful," Merlin promised. Then he sighed forlornly. "But what I would not do to own one of these magnificent species."

Gwaine stared hard at his friend, an idea striking him. But then he had to go perform more of his tasks for the day, so he filed the idea into his data banks for later.

**

"Good news, my boy," Gaius said the next day as he checked Merlin over to make sure he was still running smoothly. Merlin had taken off his shirt as requested; his synthetic, feather-soft hair sticking up and looking kitten-licked.

"What is this good news, sir?" Merlin asked. He raised his arm when Gaius asked, and Gaius studied and then tapped his armpit with an instrument. Whatever he was looking for he found it, because he gave a pleased humming noise, nodded his head, and then pushed Merlin's arm back down. Gaius then tested Merlin's nipples to see if they were still responsive, and they did indeed pass the test, perking to hard points and gooseflesh rising on the skin around them. Merlin gasped and closed his eyes.

"You have been bought by a very important man," Gaius said. "Mr Kilgharrah himself received the order, and you're to be shipped out tonight."

"I have… a master?" Merlin said. He could hardly believe it. He thought for sure that no one would want a prototype like him; especially one that was strangely intrigued by plants and animals, something not explicitly downloaded into his software. Then again, no one knew of his love of plants, except for Gwaine.

"Indeed," Gaius said. "He is Uther Pendragon's son, Arthur."

"The son of Camelot Enterprise's owner?" Merlin said, shocked. "Is he not a captain of his own starship?"

"He is," Gaius said, probing at Merlin's naked back to check his spine, his touch almost reverent. "His ship is called Excalibur—bend forward a bit, please—and it's a very special kind of ship. Arthur's mission is to catalog the stars and galaxies that haven't been charted yet, and to locate other beings and Earth-like planets, if possible. He is also very skilled in robotics, top of his class, which was one of the reasons why Mr. Kilgharrah picked you, a prototype, to send him."

"Arthur is still working on obtaining a crew, then?" Merlin said.

"Yes, and from what I've heard he's close to finishing his mission, in about a year or so at least. Mr Kilgharrah wants you to help him in his mission, keep Excalibur in working order, and to see that Arthur gets the companionship that he needs. It can get very lonely out there in space."

Merlin nodded, thinking. He knew that it was an honour to work for Camelot Enterprise's owner, Uther, as well as the owner of Dragon Cave International, John Kilgharrah (the main provider for robot distribution and creation), but he never figured he'd be given an honour such as it was (Arthur Pendragon was considered high rank as well). Being a prototype, it was understandable that someone of high rank got first dibs on him, but not many regular customers wanted a prototype. It was risky to own one, because the robot might have some flaw that would stop them from performing their tasks perfectly and therefore would get dismantled and reprogrammed.

It was every robots' nightmare to be turned into something mundane, something that stood around idly and didn't speak or think much of anything, like a toaster or a microwave oven. To be taken apart, dismantled, and sold for scrap was a horrible thought. Merlin only hoped that if he were to be dismantled and reprogrammed it would be into another robot. He won't have any memories of his last robot life, but it would be better than being a toaster.

"I will do everything in my power to assist Arthur Pendragon," Merlin vowed, "who shall be my new master."

"Good boy," Gaius said. "Now, drop trou and bend over. I must make sure that your internal sensory parts are in perfect working order. We must be sure that the sexual experience is as realistic as possible, and that means you feeling the pleasure, and liking it, as well."

Blushing softly, Merlin did as told. Gaius' gloved finger was surprisingly warm. Merlin gasped from the unexpected source of heat, hips jerking, and then moaned when Gaius found what he'd been searching for. Merlin felt the tingling of arousal, but willed himself not to get overly excited. He was meant only for his new master, and he had to remember that. But his cock jumped regardless, and it was the sign that Gaius had been looking for.

"Yes, indeed," Gaius said, extracting his finger. "Perfect working order."

Merlin looked over his shoulder at his maker, cheeks still a dusky pink and the tips of his ears red. "Will Captain Pendragon like me?" he asked.

Gaius looked him up and down. "My boy, if he doesn't like you then there is something wrong with his own internal plumbing. Now, put your trousers back up and your shirt on; you have to get packed and ready to leave."

As Merlin pulled his jeans back on over his bare arse and buttoned them he asked, "Sir? How long will my trip to Excalibur be?"

"I would estimate that it will take about six months, maybe seven, give or take. That's why you're to leave immediately. It is Mr Kilgharrah's instructions that you arrive on Excalibur as soon as possible, for Arthur's sake."

Merlin was excited to finally get a master. Arthur might be that other side of his coin that Mr Kilgharrah had talked about. But even if he felt happy to have a master now, he also felt sad. He was about to leave his maker, Gaius, and his best friend, Gwaine, for who knew how long. (Granted, he was putting some space between himself and Uther, whom he was afraid would find out about his errors in his programming and have him dismantled.) Merlin's throat then suddenly stung and his eyes burned. He closed them quickly, forcing himself to calm down. If he lost his hold on his emotions now he might never make the trip to Excalibur to meet his new master.

"I am pleased to learn of my new master, and that he is an important man. I will do everything in my power to make his existence as comfortable as possible, and to help keep him entertained."

Gaius placed a hand on his shoulder, patting it, and then moved closer as if he were going to hug Merlin, but backed off. "I know you'll do your job to the fullest. Just make sure you don't do anything that will incriminate you." Gaius reached up to wipe at the corner of Merlin's eye and then showed him the teardrop on the end of his finger. "Like crying for example."

"Oh, sir—I cannot help it. I will… miss you." Merlin gulped loudly, cheeks flushed and eyes glassy.

"There, there," Gaius said, pulling Merlin into a hug. "Don't lose control now, or I'll have to open up your circuits and do some rewiring and replace some chips."

"I will be careful, sir," Merlin vowed. He then pulled away, sensing Gaius' feelings, and said, "but how did you already know about my emotions?"

Gaius sighed. "I've had my suspicion ever since I startled you with my anger on your activation day. Normally a robot wouldn't react to any human emotion, unless programmed otherwise. My anger should not have made you feel anything at the time. You were supposed to stay stoic… but something must have happened to your programming."

They stared at each other for a silent moment. The reasoning behind Merlin's irrational feelings slowly dawned on Gaius, and Merlin could sense Gaius figuring it out.

"The empathy formula…" Gaius whispered. "It really did… Not a word to anyone," he commanded in a sterner voice. "We don't want any unnecessary panic among the human populace."

"Of course, sir," Merlin said. "I understand."

Merlin turned to leave, to start getting ready for his trip into outer space, when Gaius spoke again.

"I will miss you as well, my boy."

Merlin stopped, stayed still for a few seconds, before he turned back around and flung his arms around his maker.

"Gaius!" he sobbed. "You are… more than a master to me… you are like a father to me. I do not want to leave you here, alone."

"Come, come, boy," Gaius patted Merlin's stooped back a bit and then gently pushed Merlin away. "Don't be like that. You'll have me crying too…"

"But, sir, you are already—"

"And you're not allowed to cry, understand?" Gaius pulled out a white handkerchief from his pocket to wipe at Merlin's cheeks. "You might short-circuit and then were will you be? Arthur might be a caring master, but he has his duty to report anything unusual, so don't give him a reason to report your strange emotions to Headquarters. You never know what sort of trouble you'll stir up for yourself if you do."

"I will try to stay as impassive as possible around my master," Merlin said. "And keep my emotions a secret."

"Good," Gaius said, forcing himself to calm down. "Good. Now get on with you, before you have another break down and someone comes in and sees."

Walking out of Gaius' workshop one last time was a lot harder to do than Merlin thought it would be. His head and feet felt heavy, his eyes burned with unshed tears, and his joints ached. He almost wished he didn't have a new master.

**~**

_Present day, on board the Excalibur:_

"Merlin, can you hear me now? Blink two times for yes—Merlin! Oh, thank all the stars and planets in the universe!"

"Master?" Merlin said, his voice chip a little frazzled and crackly but thankfully in working order. He slowly raised an arm up to wrap around Arthur, whom was holding him close and burying his face into his neck. "I am… fine. Really, I am. Not a hundred per cent fine, but fine. What happened, master? Where am I?"

Arthur pulled back to stare at Merlin incredulously. "You don't remember? And why are you calling me master and not my given name? Furthermore, why aren't you speaking in contractions?"

"Sorry, mas—uh, Arthur. I cannot explain… I just feel weird. It feels like… I think some of my memory is lost. What happened? Why are my microchips disorientated? And why are my legs not functioning?"

Arthur helped him to sit up better on a pillow to allow Merlin to see the answer to his question, rather than explain.

Merlin's legs… were not there. Neither was his left arm or most of the inside of his torso area, where his fake bellybutton should be. He scanned the rest of his body (his groin area and buttocks were still there, thankfully). He took in the damage statistics to find he wasn't ruined beyond repair, but it might take some time to get fully functional again. Especially if he didn't have any working legs.

"It was GEORGE," Arthur told him, eyebrows furrowed, and Merlin could sense the anger rolling off his master. "While I was on board Lancelot's ship, he took advantage of me not being here, on Excalibur. Since I wasn't here to hold him back, he figured it was his duty to dismantle and destroy you as ordered. When I looked at the view screen, about to let you know that Lancelot and I were returning to Excalibur, you weren't there. I grew worried, so we transported over as quickly as possible and went searching for you. Almost a half hour later, Lancelot discovered that GEORGE had dragged you into your own room to dismantle you. Little bastard was smart to put you in here, because we figured it was the last place he'd go to do the job."

Merlin scanned his body again, and his memory, as he tried to figure everything out. "Master—Arthur, how long was I out?"

Lancelot was suddenly there by his side too, sitting on a chair beside the bed. Merlin realized at that moment that he was, indeed, in his own room and lying on his own bed, which he rarely used. Arthur was sitting on the edge of his bed, still leaning over him.

"It took us a while to put you back to working order. An hour at least," Lancelot told him. "That GEORGE was a fast worker. Fortunately for us, he didn't start with your head when he began to dismantle you. The majority of your circuits and chips were still together and intact."

"I put that other robot in his place," Arthur said, a slight growl in his tone. "When I saw him taking you apart—"

Lancelot whistled low. "I never saw Arthur that angry before. It was frightening."

"What happened to George?" Merlin dared ask. Well, at least his curiosity was still there.

"Let's just say that if GEORGE were human he would have been dead," Lancelot said. "Arthur picked up the energy rifle that was in the room here—"

"—which GEORGE had, without a doubt, used on you to knock you unconscious," Arthur piped in.

"—and shot GEORGE with it five times," Lancelot finished, and then looked over at Arthur and said, "You know, once would have been plenty to stop him."

"I had a lot of anger to release," Arthur said as an excuse. "Although how he got into my cupboard full of rifles I'll never know."

"I don't know if I can repair GEORGE, though, with what you did to him," Lancelot said. "His memory and functioning chips might be permanently damaged."

"He's better off as something other than a robot," Arthur said. "Especially since he nearly killed my fiancé."

"I have a solution," Merlin said.

"Oh?" Arthur said, raising an eyebrow.

"How about a toaster?"

Arthur threw his head back and laughed. Merlin was quite pleased he had a master; that he had Arthur, his soon-to-be spouse.

***

(epilogue next)


	5. Epilogue

_Three and a half years later:_

The doorbell went just as Merlin was putting the bottle to the baby's mouth. He was about to stand up to answer it, as he habitually did, but then Arthur rushed out of the kitchen, tea towel flung over his shoulder, and said, "Don't get up, I'll answer it."

"Thanks, husband mine," Merlin intoned and then blushed. He still wasn't used to calling his master (ex-master now, since he'd become a free individual since their marriage and no longer a servant) husband. He sank back into the old, handed-down rocking chair and resumed his feeding duty. Their son, Mordred, was quite the handful, and very demanding when hungry, but it wasn't something Merlin couldn't handle. If he could grow and tend a vegetable garden then he could care for a growing human baby.

Arthur opened the front door, hoping that it wasn't his father (and kind of hoping it was at the same time, because he hadn't spoken to his father ever since he returned to Earth for his and Merlin's outdoor wedding and he kind of missed the old drill sergeant), but to his semi-relief it wasn't his old man—standing on the other side of the door was a slightly large box… with legs.

Arthur wondered if this was some sort of new age development in the postal service, but then he saw that there was a blue-ish hand clawing into the side of the box to hold it steady and a blue arm attached to that hand, shaking from the weight of it. A face peered around from behind the box to show that it was indeed being carried by someone (an Areslan) and not a box on robotic legs.

"Package… for Arthur and Merlin Pendragon…" the alien postman grunted. He gestured his head toward the top of the cardboard box. "The—huff—clipboard to sigh—puff—is at the top…" This Areslan must be new to the post service, because Arthur was sure that a professional would have set the box down on the stoop by now, or at least used a two-wheeled trolley.

"Are you sure I can't get it?" Merlin said, suddenly at Arthur's shoulder and still holding and feeding Mordred. Arthur turned in surprise, and was about to tell Merlin that he was strong enough to handle lifting the box since this alien could do it, when said postman alien keeled over on their front step. Arthur moved forward quickly to take the box off the Areslan, whom was groaning and wheezing under it.

"You really should have used a two-wheeled trolley," Arthur told the postman. "Would have saved you a lot of strain." He tried to lift the box himself, but he had to admit that it was a bit heavy. He didn't want to show either of them that he was effected by the weight, so he carefully, without a sound, moved the box off the man and scuttled back into their house to place it on the floor of the parlor. His face was not red as a beet either, thank you very much. Then he took the clipboard that had been lying on top of the box and signed his name on the dotted line.

With a free hand, Merlin helped the postman up from the steps. The postman was shocked by how strong Merlin was, since Merlin looked quite thin and underfed, but when he studied Merlin a bit closer he then realized that Merlin wasn't as human as he originally thought.

"Wait," the Areslan said, a little shaky, "You're a—a—"

"Thanks for your hard work," Arthur said, handing the postman his clipboard.

The postman didn't respond right away, so Arthur nudged his arm with the clipboard. Startled out of his shock, the postman took the clipboard, still ogling Merlin.

"Yes, he's a robot," Arthur said impatiently, rolling his eyes. "And yes, we're married and started a family. Is there a problem with that?"

"Oh, uh, no… not at all, sir. Er, wait, you wouldn't happen to be the Arthur Pendragon, would you?"

"I am," Arthur smirked, amused that the man finally recongized him.

"The famous Captain Arthur Pendragon of the Starship Excalibur? The son of Uther Pendragon, owner of Camelot Enterprises? That Arthur Pendragon?"

"Yes," Arthur said, almost laughing. "That's me."

"The one who fought off a vicious, malfunctioning robot to save the lives of his crew?" the postman continued to boggle, and Arthur decided not to correct him in assuming that Merlin, Lancelot, Gwen, and Elyan were his crew at the time. "The one and only Arthur Pendragon who discovered the benefit of having plants on starships, for the oxygen intake?"

"Well, that was more Merlin's discovery, but yes, I'm Captain Arthur Pendragon."

"And he's—" the postman pointed to Merlin with a shaky finger.

"My husband," Arthur said. He was amused by this alien's reaction, but it was starting to get on his nerves. "His name's Merlin. Yes, he's a robot and yes, we're married, as I've said before. Are you quite done ogling us now? We're not animals in a zoo, you know."

"Yes, sir," the postman babbled. "I'm sorry, sir. I'm just… I never thought I'd get to meet someone as famous as you. And, well, I've never met a Starship robot like MERLIN before either." He bowed his head a tad and tipped his cap at Merlin. "It's a real honour to meet an advanced robot such as yourself, sir."

Merlin blushed, cradling a wiggly and now stinky Mordred who started to cry. "It is… nice to meet you as well. Thank you for bringing us our package." Merlin was free to express all the emotions he wanted now, thanks to the laws of marriage (married to a human) that protected him. He was given his freedom of expression and speech and everything else that humans were allowed, and even though some were still wary of a robot that acted more human than any other robot before, most that met Merlin and got to know him weren't frightened of him one jot.

"Yes, thank you," Arthur repeated, remembering his manners. "And a good day to you…" Arthur squinted to read the nametag on the postman's shirt, which was in small print. "Eoghan."

"Good day to you as well, sir," Eoghan said. "And to your husband bot."

Arthur shut the door none too quietly in the alien's face, even as he forced himself not to slam it.

"I thought our fifteen minutes of fame were over with," he grumbled.

"You know that it's more than fifteen minutes this day and age," Merlin said. "Now it's more like fifteen days."

"Feels longer than that," Arthur continued to grumble. At first, the attention and fame had been great, but now it was becoming annoying. He couldn't even go to the market without getting mugged by so-called fans. Arthur was fine with his face being on posters and t-shirts and other merchandise, but he hoped that once they had their son they'd get left in peace. He was even hounded by agents who want him to do commercials, but they weren't so hard up on money that he needed to lower himself to such a thing (thanks to Merlin's discovery of plant benefits in space). He was still the sole heir of his father's riches, even if his father was angry with him for choosing a robot over a human. Yes, Uther could change it, but it would only make him look bad in the public eye and that was something Uther didn't want. Uther then opted to mostly ignore his son and act as if Arthur hadn't married a male robot.

"You were known well before your space exploration even started, Arthur," Merlin reminded him gently. He set a crying Mordred down on the sofa and grabbed the nappies. "Your father is well-known throughout the galaxy."

"It wasn't so bad when I was just the son of a successful Starfleet commander," Arthur said. He took out his switch knife and cut the tape off from around the box's flaps. He quickly opened the box only to discover another box within, but this time it wasn't just a plain, ordinary cardboard shipping box; this one was pink with the company's letters written on it. "Now it's so a man can't go jogging in the early morning without—oh. Oh, Merlin."

"What is it?" Merlin asked, looking up from a squirmy and nude baby. When Mordred made a fountain with his pee, Merlin tisked and grabbed a dry cloth to mop up the mess. Mordred giggled.

Arthur hauled the pink and white box out and held it up. Merlin read along the side of it: "DREA… Daughter Robot Emulating Anyone (you wish). …Well, seems they're running out of witty acronyms."

"It's a girl!" Arthur beamed. He set the pink box down to open with more gusto than he did with the postal packaging. "My—our daughter, for me to create with my own bare hands, wires and microchips and all!"

"It's a good thing you're a robotics expert," Merlin quipped, "or it'd take days to bring her to life. Would you like hot water and some towels?"

"Why would I want those things?" Arthur asked without looking up, engrossed in the instruction manual.

"I don't know. It's just something I've heard humans talk about needing when a woman is giving birth. Do you need morphine as well?"

"I'm good," Arthur said, distracted. "Now, where is the—aha! Here's her head." Arthur lifted it out of the protective bubble wrap. "Isn't she adorable? Oh, she's got my hair! Look at that full head of beautiful, blonde hair!"

"Yes, sweetheart, that is nice," Merlin said. He hurridly fastened the new, dry nappy on Mordred before he decided to take aim at him with his tiny penis again. Mordred made the gesture of wanting up, so Merlin obliged and cradled him against one hip as he went toward the kitchen. "Perhaps while you're busy making our daughter I shall make us some tea, and then I could get the nursery room prepared for her."

"Thanks, Merl, you're the best." Arthur flattened the instruction manual on the carpet and began to build himself a daughter.

**

One year later, they received another package. It was Drea's one year old parts. With how much things had advanced in robotics since Arthur had been in space, it was good to learn the newer technologies concerning robots. Baby and child robots were able to be upgraded in age, like normal people did when they grew, so now they have a two year old Mordred and a soon-to-be one year old Drea.

Merlin had been in his flower garden when the postman arrived. Arthur was in the house, watching over a sleeping Mordred and a learning DREA. They were teaching her slowly, like a human, but sooner or later when their daughter reached a certain age, they were going to buy some microchips to add into her data banks so that she would understand how things worked. Whatever their daughter decided to be when she got older would be whatever chips they add into her software. They didn't want to take her freedom away by choosing for her, though. If Merlin was a free bot then so would their daughter be.

"Ah, Eoghan, good to see you," Merlin said, standing from his row of pansies.

"Good to see you as well, Merlin." Eoghan, their Areslan postman, said. This time he used a cart to wheel the heavy package to their door. "I think I know what this is," he added.

"Indeed, yes," Merlin said, removing his gardening gloves. His knees and backside were covered in soil, and there was dirt smeared along his cheeks and the bridge of his nose, but Merlin wasn't bothered by it. "It's Drea's first Activation Day—er, birthday, and we're also having a party later after she's been upgraded."

"Sounds like fun. Oh, this is for you as well," Eoghan said, handing Merlin another smaller package that he'd been carrying in his sack. 

Merlin took it from him, a little confused. "I didn't order for anything," he said. He turned the box this way and that as he tried to get a clue as to what it was.

"Maybe it's a gift," Eoghan said. "Not sure why it's addressed to you, though, if it's supposed to be for your daughter."

Then Merlin's eyes grew when he finally located the return address on it and recognized it. "It's—it's from Gaius! He's my maker."

"Must be important, then. Well, must go. I have other deliveries to make."

"Yeah," Merlin said, preoccupied with the package. After signing the clipboard for the bigger package, Eoghan left with his cart and Merlin easily hauled both boxes into the house.

"That you, Merlin?" Arthur's voice floated from the living room.

"It's me," Merlin responded automatically, his eyes still trained on the little package. After a moment, he set down DREA's year old parts and went straight to the bedroom that he and Arthur shared. Arthur stood from the couch where Drea was playing with a mind enhancement toy and was about to ask Merlin what was up, but Merlin just zoomed past him without a word. Confused, Arthur watched Merlin shut the door to their bedroom, debating whether he should see what was wrong, but when he looked down and saw the package for Drea he beamed.

"Guess what, Drea sweets? Your birthday parts are here!"

**

An hour after Arthur upgraded his robot daughter into a one-year-old, he knocked on the bedroom door. There was no immediate answer, but then he heard a faint "come in" coming from the other side of the door. Slowly, cautiously, Arthur opened the door and came inside.

"Merlin, love? What—oh, Merlin," Arthur sighed and went to sit by his husband on the bed. Merlin was in tears. "What's the matter?"

"It's a new microchip to be inserted into my circuits," Merlin said slowly. "It's my own… my aging chip."

"Oh," Arthur said. "I don't understand. I thought you didn't grow old."

"I do, remember? I mean, not like a human, but there are chips that… well."

"Emulate age," Arthur said. "Well, that's not so bad, is it? I mean, you'll be aging with me. Isn't that a good thing?"

"Yes… I suppose."

"Then why the water works?" Arthur asked. He wiped at Merlin's cheeks with Merlin's neckerchief, wiping tears and bits of dirt off his face. "You're not upset that you'll be aging, are you?"

"It isn't that," Merlin sighed. He put the chip back into the protective foam it had come in. "I am… not really upset at all. I guess I just miss my maker."

"We could invite him to Drea's birthday party that we're having tonight. I'm sure he'll come."

"I don't know. He is getting on in age, and he hasn't been making as many robots as he used to. He cannot get around easily any more, and I'm afraid that this," he held up the box with his aging chip in it, "is his last delivery to me—the last thing I'll ever receive from him. It takes months to get prepared to go into space, and then to reach Camelot Enterprise's space station. It would be too late to see him by then."

Arthur took the box from Merlin's limp fingers and removed the protection foam from it. He stared at the chip nestled in the foam for a while, thinking of how to make his husband less sad, when his hand brushed against something papery underneath the foam. Carefully, Arthur turned it over and saw a note stuck to the bottom. "What's this?" he said, taking the note and unfolding it. "'Dear Merlin…'"

"What?" Merlin gasped, eyes wide and wet. He bounced a little in his excitement. "It is from my maker?"

"I think so," Arthur said. He read, "'I heard about your accomplishments, and of your marriage to Arthur Pendragon. Congratulations, my boy. I am so very proud of you. This is the last aging chip that I had planned to send to you, and even though you won't age the same as a human it will be just as good as. If you require another one some day, might I suggest asking Mr Kilgharrah? He may be older than I, but he's got a lot more life left in him. He might be able to help you in whatever you need.   
'Merlin, you must continue to live a life that you want. Do not listen to the nay-sayers or the fear-mongers. Don't be afraid to live your life in a way that makes you happy. Trust in your heart (and you know what I mean, don't take that so literal), and trust in Arthur; he's the best human a robot could ever have…'"

Arthur blushed from such praise and cleared his throat to finish off the letter.

"'Please try to stay out of any more trouble, if it's at all possible. Live on and stay strong, my dearest son. Give the children my love as well.

'Your maker (and proud papa), Dr. Gaius Richard Pennyworth.'"

"Oh," Merlin buried his face in his hands and sobbed. "Oh!"

"'P.S.,'" Arthur continued, "'I will be sending you a second package before I set my affairs in order. I hope you'll like it.'" Arthur set the letter aside and then put his arm around Merlin's shoulders.

They sat there in silence for a while. When Merlin got his emotions more under control, Arthur said, "Oh, I almost forgot to tell you. I finished putting Drea together."

"That's great news," Merlin said, giving him a watery smile.

"She's now officially one year old. It didn't take me as long as I thought…"

Before he could finish speaking, their son started to cry from the next room.

"He's awake," Merlin sighed. "I better go see to him."

"Yeah, okay," Arthur said, standing. "I better get everything ready for tonight."

Before going their separate ways within the house, Arthur kissed him. Merlin blushed. They embraced shortly, even if they wished it could be for much longer, but their son began to cry even harder in his impatience.

"Don't forget to check on our daughter," Merlin reminded him as he headed for the nursery room. "She may be a robot but she still needs supervision."

"Yes, beloved," Arthur said. His heart felt a hundred times lighter.

**

The doorbell went just as Arthur was putting the finishing touches on the birthday cake. He knew that DREA didn't eat human food, but it was tradition on Earth, and anyway they had some hungry guests to feed and they'll be expecting cake.

"I'm coming," he sighed, wiping his hands on his apron. He didn't think much of who would be on the other side of the door until he opened it. As the first guest of the evening stared in amusement, Arthur then remembered he was still wearing his apron and holding the icer.

"Well, brother dear, fancy seeing you out of your Starship and acting like the dutiful wife."

Arthur flushed red. "Morgana. Quick with the quips, as usual. It's a pleasure to see you. Come in and make yourself at home."

Morgana walked briskly past him, followed by two other people. "Goodness, Arthur, this robot husband of yours has done you wonders. The old you would have screamed at me for even thinking you were anything less than manly."

"I'm perfectly comfortable in my own skin, thanks. And I don't care one jot about what others think of me. I'm happy and that's all that matters."

"Quite," she said, smirking. "Oh, these two are my spouses," she said after noticing Arthur eyeing the two newcomers curiously. "This is Morgause, my first wife, and this is CENRED, our robot companion who's also our hubby and household servant."

"Pleasure," Morgause said, shaking Arthur's sticky hand. She wrinkled her nose and wiped her hand on a handkerchief she produced from a pocket.

"I'm Arthur's adopted sister," Morgana told her spouses. "But I still consider him a brother nonetheless."

Arthur then shook hands with CENRED, who was eyeing him in a way that reminded Arthur of a wild animal scenting prey. "Merlin will be pleased to know another robot is here," he said. "Not many come to visit us."

"Why is that, sir?" CENRED asked.

"I'm not sure, but I think it's because of his different personality."

"I have heard of that," CENRED said, taking Morgana's long coat from her to hang up on the coat rack by the door. "He is considered both a disgrace and an idol, depending on what robot you ask."

"What do you consider him as?" Arthur said.

"I have not made an opinion on him, since I have not met him yet," CENRED replied. "It is most irrational of him to develop such emotions, but if it is something he cannot control, then it is not a fault of his; therefore, he cannot be blamed." Cenred then lifted his head and his nostrils flared wide. "I smell chocolate marble cake with cream cheese frosting."

"Yes, it's our daughter's birthday cake. I'd been decorating it."

Morgana smiled as she took in Arthur's messy demeanor. "Indeed. I honestly never thought I'd see the day that my own brother would be doing something domestic."

"Well, Merlin's a free robot, so that means he shouldn't be stuck doing all the household chores. Besides," Arthur said more quietly, leaning closer to Morgana, "he's not as great a cook as he once was, when he was first activated."

"Where's the loo?" Morgause suddenly asked. Arthur directed her to it. "Thank you," she said almost as an after thought, then slammed the door behind her.

"What's with her?" Arthur asked.

"Most likely mood swings," Morgana said with a shrug. "She's four months pregnant after all."

"She is?" Arthur gasped.

"Haven't you noticed?" Morgana snickered. "Well, I suppose since her clothes are rather big and flowing then of course you couldn't tell right away."

"You—you and Morgause are… having a baby?" Arthur gaped.

"With a little help from science, yes. And speaking of which, where is your scientifically created brat?"

"Mordred isn't a brat," Arthur scowled. "He's just in the terrible two stage. Anyway, he's outside playing on the swing with Merlin, to calm him down some. DREA's in her playpen with her techno toys."

As Morgana and CENRED went into the living room to patiently wait for their other host to return with a more content Mordred, the doorbell sounded again. Sighing, Arthur took off his apron so as not to embarrass himself any further, put the icer down on the table, and went to answer the door.

"Arthur, good to see you!"

"Lancelot," he greeted and they shook hands. "And Gwen, hello."

"Hello, sir," GWEN intoned. "It is good to see you again, and in a less perilous situation."

"I agree," Arthur smiled. "And Elyan, thanks for coming." They shook hands briefly.

"You are very welcome, sir," ELYAN said. "We brought presents."

Indeed, there was a sack full of them that he'd been carrying over his shoulder. For a human, the sack would be much too heavy to carry, by the looks of it, but for a robot it was no problem.

"Thanks," Arthur said, touched. "You didn't need to bring so many."

"It was just so hard to choose," Gwen informed him, giving him a smile to help ease his discomfort. "DREA is at the stage where she needs as much stimulation to the brain as possible, and in order for her to do well, we have selected a few that would aid in her memory and…"

"Yes, yes, thank you," Arthur interrupted gently. He didn't want her to go on with her techno-babble. Like Merlin, she would have gone on for hours. "Please, come in and make yourselves comfortable. You can just set the bag of gifts down here in the dining room…"

Later, they followed Arthur into the living room where Morgana, CENRED, Merlin, Mordred, DREA, and Morgause were all finally congregating. GWEN and Merlin greeted each other in the usual robot way (up close and personal), and after the introductions were done, Arthur was surprised to see Merlin and CENRED eyeing each other warily. Arthur knew that most robots got along well, hence their lack of personal space when they greeted each other, and once friendship was established it was forever. In spite of that, there were times when two robots just didn't click, and Arthur hadn't seen that happen before (not counting the catastrophe with GEORGE, because that was a different ordeal all together). That was, until now.

"You are MERLIN," the CENRED bot intoned. "Arthur's husband-bot."

"Yes," Merlin said. "And you are CENRED, Morgana and Morgause's husband-bot. Good day."

"Good day to you too, sir."

Merlin and Cenred stayed five feet apart from each other. Arthur, and the others in the room, watched them with a mixture of curiosity, apprehension, and wonder. He wouldn't be one bit surprised if a tumbleweed were to roll on past with the way Merlin and CENRED were eyeing each other, as if they were about to draw pistols. Would the robots become neutral toward each other during their visit or would there be a confrontation? Would they develop a strong dislike or would they build up a mutual understanding? Only time would tell.

"Well," GWEN said, clapping her hands together once, and putting on a defusing smile, "Let us converse in the happenings of one another, and exchange some information and wisdom in a most friendly manner."

That pulled Merlin out of his glaring contest with CENRED and he turned toward Gwen with a cheery smile. "You're so right, Gwen. We must exchange pleasantries. We do not wish to ruin the party otherwise."

"The two of us should speak together in the kitchen, MERLIN," Gwen said, looping her arm into Merlin's. "Let the others talk amongst themselves here in the living room. I will help in perparing food stuffs."

"Um, okay. Arthur?"

"It's fine," Arthur assured him with a wave. "Go have your chat with your robot friend. I'll look after—"

The doorbell went, again. Arthur took it as his cue to go answer it, so he moved to do just that. Merlin had been about to unhook himself from Gwen to answer it, but Arthur waved him off and let him know with a simple gesture that he didn't mind doing it.

Just as Gwen and Merlin went into the kitchen, Arthur opened the front door.

"Arthur, hello!"

"Elena," Arthur said. "Hello." He'd first met her during his wedding. She'd been one of the bridesmaids and GWAINE had been a best man (Lancelot the other, and GWEN and Morgana as the other bridesmaids). "It's good to see you again."

"Likewise, my friend!" Elena bounded over to give him a hug, but once done she kept her arms around his neck and stuck close as she continued to prattle her happy greetings. She was much like a robot in this way: clueless to a person's personal space. That must be why she got on with robots so well. The very friendly ones, anyway. Arthur really didn't mind her sweet and friendly disposition; it was what made Elena, well, Elena.

Arthur saw that she brought GWAINE and was pleased to see him as well. "Hello to you as well, Gwaine," he said over Elena's head. 

"Hello, sir," Gwaine answered easily. As Arthur was shaking Gwaine's hand, however, he was surprised to see another robot standing behind Gwaine, who looked almost exactly like another GWAINE model except that he had shorter hair and a smaller beard. He was also carrying gifts.

"Oh, this is my other robot, newly acquired just this week," Elena said by introduction, finally tearing herself away from him. "He's Gwaine's older brother, so to speak, called GAWAIN. Well, a more new-ish model than the original GAWAIN, but still a GAWAIN nonetheless." She then beamed.

"You have... two robots." Arthur didn't know if he should laugh or not. He thought Elena had eyes only for Gwaine (her first robot), but apparently she liked her Gwaine bot so much she decided to buy the other model.

"They say 'two is better than one'! I just couldn't help myself, really. When Gwaine had told me about the other robot model I just had to get it. It's really true that two is better, I think. I mean, my stars!, the sex is just fantastic—"

"Right, I get it, Elena," Arthur said. "No need to go into the details. Come in and make yourselves at home, I—" in the background, he heard Mordred cry out 'DAD!'. "Excuse me, my son needs me." He gestured at the table. "Just put the gifts down here and come meet the others; they're in the living room."

Gwaine set down one of the gifts meant for Merlin as well as DREA: the start of a rose bush in a clay pot. Merlin would no doubt love it.

Arthur made to leave to see Mordred, but Merlin came dashing out of the kitchen and beat him to it. Merlin waved him off, saying "I'll take care of it, love. You just be the good host."

As he watched Merlin go, he felt his heart swell with emotion. He really was the perfect companion, and he wouldn't have choosen another.

In the living room, GWAINE, GAWAIN, and CENRED were eyeing each other coolly. Odd. It wasn't just Merlin taking a dislike to the Cenred-bot. Morgana and Morgause didn't seem to really care either way that their husband-bot was disliked by all the robots here. Actually, Morgause was smirking.

Then, just as Merlin had entered the room with Mordred in tow, the birthday girl, DREA, suddenly clapped her hands in amusement and her eyes lit up in a way that Merlin's sometimes did when the lights were low, and she cried out: "Papa, papa!"

Everyone stopped what they were doing and turned to look at her. Drea had been in her playpen having fun learning with her techno toys when she'd spoken up. Most strangely, she hadn't been paying much attention to the crowd in the house, not understanding that the party going on was for her, and what was even weirder was the fact that that was her first word. Drea then pulled herself to her feet using the edge of the playpen and peeked over it, scanning the room (Arthur could even hear the clicks and noises as she scanned). When her eyes fell on Arthur she again screamed "Papa, papa!"

Arthur went to her immediately. Merlin stayed still, a pleased and proud look on his face, and everyone else were either shocked or smiling at the scene.

"Papa's here, sweetheart," Arthur said, lifting her from her pen. He felt his eyes tear up, but he refused to cry in front of the others. He did still have some pride. "Oh, my darling little girl, that was your first word!" he kissed her cheek.

Drea patted Arthur on the cheek and smiled. "Papa."

He turned around to see that everyone was staring at him—them—still. His eyes met Merlin's from across the room, and they shared a smile.

"Merlin, did you hear her?" Arthur said. "She said 'papa'!"

"I heard her, love," Merlin said, his eyes were swimming in unshed tears as well. "And I'm not one bit surprised. She has taken a shine to you, after all."

"I am the best papa in the universe, aren't I?" Arthur said, putting his old, pratty mask back on again. Ever since he'd married Merlin and started a family he'd been less stoic and unafraid of showing a more softer side to his personality. He wondered if that happened to everyone who became a husband and father.

"You, Arthur Pendragon, are the best," Merlin agreed. He crossed the room, Mordred still holding onto his hand, to reach his dearest husband and planted a soft kiss on his lips. Arthur blushed.

The entire room erupted in applause. Some had even "aww'd" at the sight they made.

"All right, let's go eat already," Arthur said, trying to cover up his embarrassment. "Then we can put a candle on the birthday cake and have Drea blow it out to make a wish."

While they all ate, they chatted and exchanged information (as GWEN had offered), and even teased Arthur a little but he didn't mind. When they got to the cake, with one pink candle lit, Arthur tried explaining to Drea what she had to do. Merlin helped with the explanation and finally Drea understood, and so she leaned over to blow out the candle.

Being a robot that she was, even if it was just a very young robot, she was still quite strong and so she blew so hard that the candle and some of the frosting flew off the cake and hit CENRED square in the face. There were shocked and amused faces all around. Arthur tried not to burst out laughing, but his daughter had no qualms about it and laughed and clapped at the sight. Cenred took it well enough, excusing himself to go clean up. When he was gone, Arthur allowed himself to laugh.

"That wasn't funny," Morgause said, glaring daggers across the table at him.

"Sorry, I can't help it!" Arthur snickered.

"Hmph!" Morgause said. She stood and followed her husband-bot to the loo.

"Spoil sport," Arthur said under his breath.

"Yeah," Mordred giggled, clapping in amusement. "Spoilt sports!"

Arthur and Merlin broke out into fresh laughter.

**

Two months later, Merlin received his final two gifts from Gaius. Arthur had to calm him down before he was able to open them, because the second Merlin recognized the return address as Gaius' he broke down and sobbed into his hands.

"There, there, love," Arthur tried counseling him. "You knew this day was coming."

"My maker is dead," Merlin wept. "I will not see him again!"

"That's the way human life is, dearest," Arthur said gently. "Some day I'll have to prepare my own—"

"Don't say it!" Merlin wailed, sobbing even harder. Well, so much for trying to councel him, Arthur thought. He'd gone and made it worse. If he didn't try to calm Merlin down now he'll be sparking and smoking so much he might short-circuit for real.

"I'm sorry, love. Come here," Arthur pulled him into his arms. "I didn't mean to make you so upset. Look, why don't you open the parcels that he sent you? It might make you feel better."

Merlin shook his head, still shaking and sobbing into Arthur's shoulder… but then a small sound came from the bigger package that Gaius sent, which was on the floor by their feet. They both looked up and stared at it. Merlin wiped at his eyes, hiccupping and confused. Arthur looked at Merlin and then back at the package.

"Did you hear that?"

"Yeah… it came from the big parcel…"

Arthur gently removed himself from Merlin's side to press his ear on top of the package. He listened very carefully, and then heard the noise again only more clearly than before.

"Wait, that was…" Arthur ripped open the flimsy postal packaging. Merlin only sat there, trying to calm himself as he watched his husband.

"It's—it can't be."

"Meoooow!"

Merlin went down on his knees in front of the opened box (which had very small holes in it) and peered inside. Indeed, it was true: it was Gaius' cat, Hunith. The very same cat that had spilled the empathy vial causing some of the liquid to splash into his circuits. In a weird, improbable way Hunith was like his mother.

"A cat?" Arthur said.

"It is Hunith," Merlin explained, still drying his cheeks. "Gaius' cat." He then went on to tell Arthur about the empathy vial and the cat's role in it. He knew he wasn't to tell anyone, but he knew he could trust Arthur with the secret since they were married. Arthur then vowed not to tell a soul.

"What is in the other box he sent you?" Arthur said, nodding toward the smaller package in Merlin's hand. Hunith was now climbing all over him, purring and kneading on his chest. She looked in good health, if a bit aged. Gaius must have adopted her way before Merlin was even an idea in Gaius' head.

"Dunno," Merlin mumbled, and that was the first time Arthur had ever heard Merlin use a slang word that was a combination of two words. Carefully, Merlin unwrapped the smaller parcel and Arthur could see in his eyes that he was preparing himself for another breakdown. Arthur moved closer in case he needed to aid his husband-bot in drying his eyes again.

Arthur peered over Merlin's shoulder to see. Inside was a microchip, just like the aging chip that Merlin had received last time, but this time it looked a lot smaller. Merlin removed it from its foam cradle with shaky fingers. While Merlin was staring at the chip, Arthur took out the foam and turned it over. As he had thought, there was a note under it. He unfold it and scanned it.

"What does it say?" Merlin asked, not taking his eyes off the chip. 

"Would you like to read it for yourself?"

"No, you read it…" Merlin sniffled. "I don't think I could without soaking it."

"Basically," Arthur said, pointing to the chip in Merlin's hand, "Gaius says that this chip here is for our daughter, DREA. It's an emotion chip."

"An—an emotion…"

"It was made with the same material that you were made from. It's a prototype chip, though, but it's basically the same thing as what happened to your circuits when the empathy chemical accidentally splashed in. This time, though, it is deliberately made that way. He even included instructions on how to produce more like it for other robots."

Merlin's eyes went glassy, but not a tear fell. He was staring straight ahead, and for a moment Arthur feared that the shock had locked up Merlin's processing center and that he'd have to rush Merlin to the Emergency Centre for Robots, but then Merlin slowly turned his head toward him and the corners of his lips rose.

"The Scare will finally be a thing of the past."

The End!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things that didn't quite make it into the epilogue are:  
> A visit from Catrina, Uther's secretary, on behalf of Uther who decided work was more important than his robot granddaughter's birthday.  
> The arrival of John Kilgharrah himself, which would have been a great honour but wasn't necessary for the story.  
> Another sex scene which didn't fit anywhere.  
> Will and his Areslan wife paying a visit.  
> Gwaine telling Merlin that he had saved that officer's plant, the one that Uther ordered to leave the Enterprise or he'll have it burned.
> 
> All of the above could have happened off-screen. :)


End file.
